


Woman Undone

by grrriliketigers



Category: The Closer
Genre: F/F, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-05
Updated: 2014-06-06
Packaged: 2018-02-03 13:46:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 13
Words: 28,286
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1746833
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/grrriliketigers/pseuds/grrriliketigers
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sharon Raydor is no stranger to Law & Order, considering her spotless service record as a Captain in the New Orleans PD but she finds herself on the wrong side of the justice system when she is found sitting next to the smoldering remains of the family car and her husband's body on Kennesaw Mountain, near Atlanta Georgia. She remains tightlipped about what happened and is set up with former ADA Gavin Q. Baker as her defense attorney and soon word of the case reaches Brenda Leigh Johnson, a Deputy Chief with the Atlanta PD and she gets involved, as obsessed with finding the truth as Gavin is with prying it out of the penitent Sharon.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is a Closer-verse retelling of Woman Undone, I hated the ending and it needed fixing. Originally posted over at ff.net and I finally got around to moving it over.
> 
> it is NOT necessary to have seen Woman Undone and if you haven't, this doesn't even spoil anything. I borrowed things here and there but it's a different story for the most part.

Prologue

Sharon sat on the side of the road, looking in a daze across at the smoldering car. 

Her watch had been broken for the better part of the day and she wondered what time it was and when someone would drive by. She hadn’t thought they were that far into the mountains but maybe they’d gone further than she’d thought. 

There were moments when her tired and overtaxed mind would nod off and for just a second she’d start to believe that it had all been a dream. Maybe it was all a misfiring of neurons but then she’d catch sight of the car and everything would flood back to the forefront of her mind. The images were sobering and knocked the wind out of her. 

It really had all happened. 

The car was wrecked, small fires still crackled in the engine, she’d sprained an ankle and lost both of her shoes, her dress was torn, she probably had a concussion and her husband was dead.


	2. Chapter 2

When she heard the first approaching vehicle her heart wrenched with panic. It was almost as if the day and a half of surviving on her wits had made her feral. She leapt to her feet, ignoring the pain that shot through her ankle and up her leg as she ducked behind the nearest tree. 

An old Chevy truck puttered loudly along as it drove and it was nearly past the car before the driver saw it. The truck came to a squeaky halt and the driver jumped out. “Hey! Anybody in there?” He ran over to it.

The good Samaritan grabbed the driver’s side door but recoiled from the hot metal and then turned pale when he saw the charred body inside. 

He turned his back to the car, put his hands on his knees to steady himself and retched. Most people only see dead bodies at open casket funerals after the undertaker has covered up the look of death with industrial strength make-up. The smoking, charred body of a man, his skeletal structure exposed, bits of his polyester blend shirt melted to the leather seat behind him, was not something that anyone was accustomed to seeing. 

“Sweet jesus…” he mumbled, crossing himself as he stumbled towards his truck, reaching into his pocket. He heard a rustle and caught movement out of the corner of his eye and when he looked up he saw Sharon Raydor standing next to the tree she’d been hiding behind. 

He stared at her for a few long moments. He was clearly having an internal battle, trying to decide if she was real or if she was an apparition or a beautiful coping mechanism to gloss over the horror he’d just seen. 

She stepped forward. Without the benefit of adrenaline this time the pain in her ankle was too much and she collapsed onto the ground. 

He moved closer, still wary of her. She let out a breath as she looked up into the sky, the dehydration and hunger starting to get to her, the vertigo spinning the sky and the treetops as she stared up. Her knees throbbed where they’d just hit the road, she was probably bleeding. She didn’t care right now because someone had found her, someone had found the car and now it was going to be alright. 

On that positive note, she almost smiled before passing out. 

**

She awoke in the passenger seat of the old Chevy; her head pounded, her body ached but she was awash with a feeling of relief. The driver glanced over at her, “thank god.” He said, “you’re awake.” 

She remained silent. 

“I was afraid… I thought maybe you were going to…” he cleared his throat, shifting in his seat, uncomfortable to even think about the car. “Are you okay? I’m taking you to a hospital.”

She vaguely understood that he was talking and even supposed that he was talking to her but she couldn’t focus on it. She leaned her head against the cold glass of the window. The truck went over a bump and Sharon’s head bounced against the window, hitting it with a soft thud. 

She grunted and reached up to slowly massage her forehead, leaning her head back against the headrest and staring up at the ceiling. 

“Do you, uh, speak English?” He asked, his heart still pounding. 

Sharon’s lips moved a little but no sound came out. 

“¿Habla español?”

Sharon closed her eyes again. Right now? No, right now she didn’t speak anything. _Ask me again in an hour…_ she thought as she drifted back into unconsciousness. 

**

Sharon was halfway through the preliminary examination before things really started to register again. She reached up clutch her head and realized that she was hooked up to fluids and she regarded them as though she’d never seen anything like them before. 

The nurse gently pushed her arms down, resting her hands in her lap. “You’re okay.” She said, lifting a small light to Sharon’s eyes. “You’re in the hospital. We’ve set your ankle and we’re getting fluids in you.” 

Sharon’s pupils reacted to the light but Sharon didn’t react to the nurse’s words. All of a sudden she felt a deluge of feelings, slamming into her unbidden. She gasped, feeling breathless and when she breathed out again it came in a sob. 

Once she started crying she couldn’t stop. She just wanted to cry until she drowned; she wanted to close her eyes and never wake up. She wanted to be washed clean, she wanted the last ten years to be erased, she wanted to start everything all over again. 

The nurse rubbed her back soothingly, “you just go ahead and cry. You’ve got every reason in the world to cry.” 

Oh, if only she knew.

**

Sharon lay awake in the hospital bed, curled up as tightly as she could manage, letting her thoughts drift aimlessly. She still hadn’t spoken to anyone and she didn’t know how much time had passed. 

She could hear her nurse talking with the sheriff in the hallway. Their voices were soft but clear and they were talking about her. 

“No, she still hasn’t said a word,” the nurse said. Sharon couldn’t remember her name or if she’d even told her. 

There was a rustling of paper. It was a police case folder, Sharon would know the sound anywhere, she knew it better than the sound of her own voice. “We got a hit off her fingerprints.” The sheriff said. 

So her cloak of anonymity was being lifted and she was about to be asked to own up to her life, to stand up and announce proudly to the world that she was _Captain Sharon Raydor_. She felt anything but proud and she wished she was anyone but Captain Sharon Raydor. 

The sheriff entered her room and her eyes followed him across the room as he grabbed the chair and dragged it over to her bedside. He had the file folder in his lap and he looked at her with sympathy but not pity. 

“Hello, Captain.” He greeted respectfully. 

She opened her mouth and nothing came out so she closed it again and gathered spit in her dry mouth before swallowing it and trying again. “Hello, Sheriff.” Her voice was rough but steady. 

“Do you know where you are?”

“Somewhere in Georgia. In a hospital.” 

He took a small notepad out of his breast pocket and flipped it open. “Do you feel up to answering a few questions?”

“Sure.” 

“What brought you to Georgia?”

“Vacation… a mid-week getaway…”

“The car-”

“Burned…” Sharon breathed, remembering the scene in vivid, ghastly detail. “It slammed into the tree and it just went up… there was nothing I could do…” 

He studied her face. The subject was obviously still raw and painful and he didn’t want to push her too hard but he had one more question he had to ask, “the man who was in the car…”

“My husband…” she whispered and as she called up an image of his face she felt her stomach lurch and she squeezed her eyes shut, fighting back the nausea. “Oh fuck…” 

“Do you know anyone in the area? Do you have a place to stay?” 

Sharon shook her head. 

“I’ll get you set up at the Lakeside Motel.” He stood, “thank you for speaking with me, Captain and I’m sorry for your loss.” 

He left the room and she curled up again, the fluorescent lights in the hallway buzzed and the nurses bustled and talked at the nurse’s station by the elevators. Sharon was a million miles away; she was adrift in nothingness. 

**

_“Mommy’s home!” Terry called out to the enthusiastic children. Jesse ran down the hallway ahead of Terry as Terry tightened his grip on Faith and jogged to the front door._

_“Hey!” Sharon smiled, tossing her keys into the key bowl, “there’re my little monsters! How are you today? How was school?” She carressed her son’s soft hair._

_“It was good I did_ minus _in math today!”_

_“No way, that’s great!” Sharon bent down and picked him up, “so are you starting college soon?” She teased. He giggled and threw his arms around her neck._

_“What about you, princess? Did you do anything fun?”_

_“¿Como esta, mama?”_

_“Let me guess, you watched Dora?” She looked between her two young kids, “you two are just getting_ too _smart! You better stop it right now or you’re going to get smarter than your dad and me!”_

_“And Dylan too?”_

_“Oh, I don’t know.” Sharon shrugged, “Dylan’s pretty smart…” She looked to her husband with a smile, “how about you, honey? What mischief did you get up to today?”_

_“Oh, the usual: work, monster wrangling,” he nodded toward Faith with a smile. “I made dinner.”_

_Sharon nodded, “I smell it, it smells delicious.”_

_“Do you want to go tell Dylan dinner’s ready?” Terry asked pointedly._

_“Sure.” She kissed Jesse’s cheek and set him down. She mounted the stairs as Terry and the kids went the other way, toward the kitchen._

_She knocked on Dylan’s door and received no answer. She knocked a little harder and he called out, “I’m busy!”_

_“Hey kiddo, dinner’s ready.”_

_The door opened and Dylan peered out at his mother, “oh, it’s you.”_

_“Yeah, it’s me.” Sharon ruffled up his hair. He swatted her hand away and smoothed down his do. “Did you have a good day?”_

_He shrugged with an eye roll. “I went to_ school _.”_

_“Haha, alright,” she cocked her head toward the stairs, “come on, smells like Terry made lasagna.”_

_“I hate lasagna.” Dylan grumbled, brushing past her._

_“Hey, doesn’t your mother get a hug?” Sharon stood in place with her arms outstretched._

_“Maybe later.”_

_She followed him down the stairs. “I’m going to hold you to that.”_

_“I said_ maybe _.” Dylan reminded, “don’t get your hopes up too high.”_

_**_

_Sharon was standing at the sink doing the dishes when her phone rang. She glanced at it and then looked around to make sure she was alone in the room, looked out the window to confirm that Terry was on the patio with Jesse and Faith._

_She picked up the phone, “hey, I thought we agreed I would call you.”_

_She listened for a moment. “No, I told you, we have to cool things off for awhile.” Pause. “Of course, he knows, he’s not_ completely stupid. _”_

_She watched her husband from the window and she sighed. “Look, I can’t see you anymore. I’m going to try to make things work-” she listened and then laughed, “no, we can’t have one last fuck for the road.”_

_When Sharon looked up she didn’t see Terry out the window anymore. Suddenly she was aware that the person on the other end was talking again. “I’m sorry... What? Have to go.” She heard the sliding door open and she quickly hung up the phone._

_“How are the dishes going?”_

_“I’m almost done.” Sharon smiled, plunging her hands back into the dish water._

_“You don’t have to go back to work tonight, do you?”_

_“Uh, no,” she shook her head, “I have to finish a couple of reports but I brought them with me.”_

_“Cool.” He went to the refrigerator and grabbed a beer before heading back outside. When the door closed behind him Sharon let out the breath she’d been holding._

_**_

_Terry was lying on the bed with a book when she entered and shut the door behind her. “The kids are in bed…” she purred, unbuttoning her blouse and slipping out of it._

_He sat up a little and set his glasses on the bedside table, watching Sharon strip._

_She stepped out of her skirt and crawled over him. She ran her hands up his bare chest as she straddled his hips. He made no move to reciprocate and she sighed a little, “what, are you going to be mad at me forever?”_

_His hands came up to grip her ass and pull her down against him. Sharon slipped her eyes shut and moaned softly. He lifted up to push his pyjama bottoms down and kicked them off. She reached down and stroked him._

_He groaned and reached up to knead her lace-clad breasts. She pushed her breasts into his hands and bucked against him. She got up just long enough to pull off her panties before sliding down onto him with a sigh and a moan._

_Rising up and driving down she set the pace, slow and sensual. He wrapped his arms around her middle and flipped them over. She hmphed in surprise and he jerked his hips, bucking wildly. “Hey! Slow down!” She hissed._

_Her protests only encouraged him, feeling vindictive as his hips slammed into hers until he felt his orgasm starting to rip through him, he groaned into her hair and then collapsed on top of her._

_Panting, he rolled off to lay down next to her._

_She narrowed her eyes at him in disgust. “Seriously?”_

_He leaned up and turned the lamp off – out of sight, out of mind – and closed his eyes to go to sleep. Sharon let out a heavy sigh and got up to take a shower – apparently, if she wanted something done right, she had to do it herself…  
_


	3. Chapter 3

“Hey Jeff,” Gavin greeted, “you’re just in time for coffee.” 

Despite having other, more pressing, business he couldn’t resist having a cup of Gavin’s coffee. He followed his friend into the kitchen. “What brings you by?”

“Can’t a guy just stop by and say hi?” Jeff pushed himself up onto the stool at the kitchen island. Gavin set a cup in front of him and Jeff picked it up, “and drink his friend out of house and home?”

Gavin smiled as he sat next to Jeff. “You usually bring me a case you want to talk about… and before you try to feign innocence, I saw the file folder.” 

“This one’s a little different…”

“Aren’t they all?” 

“But this one…” Jeff handed over the file folder, “here see for yourself.” 

Gavin put his glasses on and looked it over. “Looks pretty cut and dry… dead man in the car, bruised and battered woman by the roadside.” 

“I know, I just… I set her up at Lakeside, would you just go and talk to her?” 

“Why?” Gavin asked, flipping the page to the copy of Sharon’s hospital discharge form. “She’s a Captain.” 

“In New Orleans.” Jeff nodded, “she seems a little… fragile?… I don’t know, it’s hard to put my finger on… I just get the feeling she needs someone to talk to.”

“You old softie.” Gavin teased, “you’ve got the hots for her, don’t you? It’ll never work: a good ol’ Georgia boy and a down in the bayou woman. I think star crossed lovers is the best you could hope for.” 

“Don’t be a smartass, okay? Just go talk to her.” 

**

 _Sharon clenched her fist, thrusting forward with a grunt, her hand slamming into the used and abused punching bag._ Front punch. Back punch. Ridge hand. _Her pony-tailed hair whipping the sides of her face everytime she countered._ Back fist. Twist back fist. __

_She pummeled the bag, grunting with each strike, feeling the anger channeling from within her into the force of her punches._

_She was covered in a sheen of sweat as she pushed her body harder and harder._

_“Hey, hey.” A voice cut through Sharon’s haze, grabbing and steadying the bag. “That’s a great way to dehydrate yourself.”_

_Sharon panted, watching the woman with mild interest._

_“Go grab a water and we’ll spar.”_

_Sharon narrowed her eyes._

_“My name’s Stacy Ward. I’m the new fitness trainer here.” She offered, noticing Sharon’s hesitance. “You’ve got great form but I can help you with endurance.”_

_“There’s nothing wrong with my endurance, thank you.” Sharon smirked._

_“Oh, I’m sure.” Stacy raised an eyebrow coyly. “But it’s always more fun with someone else: skin to skin instead of skin to plastic.”_

_Sharon considered this for a moment before nodding. “Alright, I’ll get a water, I’ll be right back.”_

_**_

_Sharon was shoving her sweaty gym clothes into her gym bag and checking her phone for missed calls when Stacy walked into the locker room._

_“Good fight.”_

_Sharon turned around on the bench. “Hope I didn’t hit you too hard…”_

_“You certainly weren’t a limp fish.” Stacy grinned, “we should do it again sometime.”_

_“Definitely.” Sharon agreed, pulling on her tall boots and zipping them up. “I’m usually here on Friday, Saturday and Sunday. Maybe you could advise me on weight training.”_

_“You’re a cop, aren’t you?”_

_“Yeah.”_

_“Why don’t you use the NOPD gym?”_

_Sharon hesitated for a second before she admitted, “I’m IA. People can’t really relax around me so I don’t use it as a courtesy.”_

_“That’s classy of you.”_

_“I like this gym. It’s closer to my house.”_

_“If you’re looking for a really great work out, I can recommend some other ways to break a sweat.” Stacy said softly, leaning into Sharon’s personal space a little._

_Sharon held up her left hand, her gold wedding band catching light. “I’m married.”_

_“I wasn’t proposing to you.” Stacy said coyly, giving Sharon a seductive grin. “If you ever change your mind…” she trailed off before giving Sharon her best bedroom eyes and turning and leaving the locker room._

_Sharon watched her leave and found herself smiling. She pulled her bag shut and zipped it up and walked out to her car. Just because she was chained to the fence didn’t mean she couldn’t bark at the cars… but she was committed to doing her best to grin and bear it and be faithful to her husband._

_The thing that made it really hard was the way he was treating her ever since he’d discovered her affair. He was being passive aggressive and refused to have_ good _sex with her and that had a way of taking a toll on a woman as sexual as Sharon…_

_She did love him… she found herself having to remind herself of that more and more often… but she did. She’d loved him enough to marry him and she’d loved him enough to have two kids with him. Terry was a great father to Jesse and Faith. Terry and Dylan never really clicked but men are weird about other men’s children and Dylan was at that age where he wasn’t interested in his mother or stepfather anyway._

_She had a mantra of all the reasons to love him and why she shouldn’t leave him which she repeated to herself religiously on her ride home._

__He’s sort of smart. He used to be good in bed… might be again sometime… He’s free childcare. He’s non-threatening. He makes a decent amount of money.

 _Some days she was able to muster a longer list and other days it had to be enough just to say_ it’s easier to stay with him than to divorce him. __

_But today she thought it could work out, it could all work out. They could get back to that place where they loved each other. She would see to it that Jesse and Faith had their father even if she hadn’t been able to give that to Dylan._

_**_

_Sharon stepped over the threshhold of the house, dropping her keys into the bowl. Terry looked up at her from the couch._

_“Where are the monsters?” Sharon asked, hanging up her coat._

_“Asleep.” He said curtly, “it’s past eleven.”_

_“Really?” Sharon looked at her watch. “You’re up late, is anything wrong?”_

_“Other than the fact we never see each other? No.” He stood up and crossed his arms across his chest. “Some days you just go from work to the gym and you don’t even come home for dinner.”_

_“I have to stay in shape. It’s part of my job.” Sharon frowned. “I’ve always done that, that’s not what this is about.”_

_“So, what, you can read my mind now?”_

_“Are we going to have a discussion or are you just going to be an asshole?” Sharon demanded._

_“I don’t want to put up with your shit so all of a sudden I’m an asshole?” Terry rolled his eyes, “because you’re so fucking perfect…”_

__Free childcare. __

_“I’m just saying that it might be more constructive if we had a conversation about what you’re feeling instead of me just hanging around the house so you can treat me like shit.”_

_“How could you possibly not know what I’m feeling?”_

_“What do you want from me, Terry?” She demanded. “The way you’re treating me it certainly doesn’t make me want to stay with you.”_

_“Oh, yeah, where would you go?” He shook his head with annoyance, “home to your_ mother _?”_

 __He used to be so nice and so attentive… __

_Her nostrils flared in anger. “That was uncalled for.”_

_“You know what was uncalled for? You fucking another guy. That was completely uncalled for. I’d say that my anger with you is completely called for.”_

_“You can be angry but you don’t have to be such a shit about it.”_

_“Well, you can think I’m lousy in bed but you don’t have to be a big whore about it.”_

__It’s easier to stay with him than to divorce him… __

_“Okay, fuck you. I’m going to take a shower and I’m going to go to bed.” Sharon said with resignation, holding her hands up in defeat._

**

Sharon was just getting out of the shower when she heard the knock. She opened the door, hair dripping and soaking into the towel that was wrapped tightly around her. “What?” 

“Um… hi…” Gavin let his eyes drop to take in her appearance. It had been a very long time since he’d noticed any woman but considering what he’d read in her file about her last 24-hours, she looked pretty fucking amazing. “My name is Gavin Q. Baker. Sheriff Bearden sent me to talk to you…” 

She considered this for a moment before opening the door wider and letting him enter. 

“Let me just get dressed.” She said as she disappeared into the bathroom again. She had the torn white dress and a dress that one of the nurses had given her. It didn’t suit her but it was better than the dirty and bloody white dress that used to be her favorite. 

**

_“Hey kiddo,” Sharon said, slowing down next to Dylan. “Hop in, I’ll give you a ride home.”_

_He opened the back seat to throw his backpack in before getting into the passenger side and she drove off. “So, you’re not staying at home, are you?”_

_“No… I’m not.”_

_“Figures.”_

_“I have to serve a warrant.”_

_“Yeah… you_ have _a job so you have to serve warrants and make arrests and whatever but you_ have kids _… don’t you have to contribute to raising them a little?”_

_Sharon sighed a little. “Terry works from home, he knew my schedule, we have a system worked out.”_

_“Not the way he tells it.”_

_“I’m not_ never _home… it just seems like I’m not home very much because Terry’s always home.” Sharon glanced at her son._

_“Sometimes I don’t know why you ever even bothered having me.”_

_“Dylan-”_

_“No, seriously. You and dad were both cops and why would he even put himself in danger if he knew he had a kid?”_

_Sharon thought about this for a moment. “It’s complicated, Dylan. Your father was a good man and a good cop and you should be proud of him.”_

_“And I should be proud of you?” He asked, “because you make such great decisions?”_

_“Dylan, I-”_

_“Let me out of the car. I want to walk home.” He grabbed his backpack from the backseat._

_Sharon scowled, “don’t be ridiculous!”_

_“I’m going to jump out if you don’t stop the car right now.” He grabbed the handle and pulled the door open._

_Sharon slammed on her brakes. “What is wrong with you?” She demanded. “That was reckless and dangerous!”_

_He slammed the door behind him and she rolled down the passenger side window and called after him. “Get back in the car!”_

_“I’ll see you later or tomorrow or whenever you decide to come home.” He yelled._

_Sharon was about to retort and demand he get back in but the person in the car behind her laid on his horn._

**

When she came out of the bathroom Gavin had already sat in the chair at the desk so Sharon perched on the edge of the bed. 

They watched each other silently for a few long moments before Sharon rolled her eyes. “Was there something you needed?” 

“I just wanted to talk to you about what happened yesterday.” He fidgeted a little, there was something off-putting about the way her steady and unwavering gaze penetrated him. “If you don’t mind my saying so, you look very calm.” 

“Last time I checked that wasn’t a crime…” Sharon formed the words clearly and distinctly. 

“You’re from _New Orleans_?” 

“I’m originally from California.” 

Gavin sighed, “okay. I’m not really sure why I’m here… Sheriff Bearden asked me to come talk to you… I used to be with the DA’s office, so…” he shrugged, “I don’t know.”

She raised her eyebrows, “are you suggesting I need a lawyer?”

“No… I just…” he sighed, “you know what? Why don’t I take you to T.J. Maxx and we’ll get you a better fitting outfit.” 

She nodded, “sounds good.” 

**

“I noticed that you don’t have any injuries normally indicative of a car accident.”

“I wasn’t in the car when it crashed.” Sharon admitted. “I spent the night in the woods. At one point, I fell.”

“Was your husband looking for you when he crashed? Did you see it happen?”

“Yes, he was looking for me and I… saw the whole thing.” 

“I’m sorry.” Gavin said softly. 

She shrugged, “it’s not even the worst accident site I’ve ever seen.” 

“But he was your husband.” 

“You’ve seen one dead body you’ve seen them all.” 

Gavin felt a chill run down his spine at her words. He glanced at her to see that she was looking out the window. She was either still in shock or she was sociopathic. 

“The motel phone won’t let me dial long distance.” She turned back to Gavin. “Can you help me find a phone that will? I need to call my children.” 

“You have children?” 

“My file didn’t tell you that?”

“It’s very short. It’s mostly your exam notes and a small background from your NOPD colleagues. How many children do you have?”

“I have three,” she smiled, “I have a seventeen year old son who’s… _definitely_ more mature than I am and I two little ones, a boy and a girl, four and five. I miss them a lot… I work long hours but I still get to _see_ them every day. I can’t remember the last time I’ve gone so long without seeing them…” 

“After T.J. Maxx we can stop at my place. You’re welcome to use my phone.” 

“Thank you, Gavin.” She beamed at him and suddenly Gavin felt like he was on top of the world. Her smile was radiant and it was enough to make him think that his first, cold impression of her had been wrong. 

He continued driving toward the store with renewed conviction and he was finally actually happy that Jeff had asked him to go see her. 

**

_“Mommy!” Faith jumped up from the couch. She’d taken a short nap so she was energized again by the time Sharon finally walked through the door._

_“Well, hello, cutie, what are you doing up?” Sharon leaned down and scooped her youngest into her arms._

_“She wanted to stay up so she could show you the drawing she made.” Terry said, shutting the television off and standing. “I’m going to bed.”_

_He leaned over and kissed Faith’s forehead and turned to go down the hallway._

_“What about mommy’s goodnight kiss?” Faith asked._

_“I’ll give it to her later. When she comes to bed.”_

_Sharon sighed inwardly, she would almost certainly be getting an earful. “Let me see your drawing, sweetie.”_

_“Kay, it’s on the coffee table!”_

_Sharon carried her back into the living room and sat down on the couch. Faith grabbed the drawing from the table and held it up to her mother. The drawing depicted sharon in her dress blues and holding a sunshine yellow badge and a big smile. Faith had also drawn herself standing next to Sharon – barely reaching the figure’s knees – also wearing dress blues and holding a badge._

_“Oh, Faith,” Sharon let out a breath, feeling her eyes water a little, “I love it. Is this you?”_

_“I want to be just like you when I grow up.” Faith nodded enthusiastically, “Dylan says you help make the world a safer place and that’s what I want to do.”_

_Sharon wrapped her arms tightly around Faith and held her close._

_“You really love it?” Faith asked softly._

_“I really, really love it.”_

_“So why are you crying?”_

_“Sometimes when grown-ups love something so much it makes them cry.”_

_Faith giggled, “that’s silly.”_

_“Grown-ups are pretty silly.” Sharon admitted, wiping away the tears._

**

Sharon came out of the first floor bathroom and Gavin nodded approvingly, “that looks much better on you.” He stood up, “the phone is in here.” 

He led her to the study, “take your time. I get unlimited long distance.” He shut the door to give her privacy and walked back to his kitchen, wondering what he could make for lunch when his phone rang. 

“Hey Jeff.” He said as he bent to examine the bottom shelf. 

“Have you been to see Captain Raydor yet?”

“Yeah, I’m with her now, actually. She’s in the other room.” He extracted a jar of pickles of dubious age. “I’ve offered to let her stay here until she can go back to Louisiana.” 

“Well, it might be longer than we thought…” Jeff admitted slowly.

“Oh? Why?” Gavin set the jar down and turned his attention more fully to the phone conversation.

“Don just got done with autopsying the husband and… there was a bullet in his head.” 

“Was it the cause of the death?” Gavin’s eyes went wide. 

“Impossible to tell… the body was too far gone.” 

Sharon stepped out of the den and into the kitchen. 

“Hey Jeff, I’ll call you back.” He hung up the cell phone. “That was fast.”

“There was no answer.” Sharon studied Gavin’s paled features. “Something wrong?”

“They found a bullet in your husband’s head.” 

“Oh.” 

“Oh? That’s all you have to say?”

“What do you want me to say?” She shook her head. 

“If I’m going to represent you you need to be completely honest with me.” He put his hands on his hips.

She shrugged with nonchalance, “I don’t actually remember asking you to represent me.”


	4. Chapter 4

“Hey, Tom, you find something else?” The Sheriff asked as he entered the morgue again. 

Tom Wilkins had the charred remains of Terry Hanson still lying on the metal table in the middle of the room. Jeff still couldn’t look at it so he kept his eyes trained on Tom. 

“I fished out your slug. It was no small job, let me tell you.” Tom held out the small plastic container housing the the bullet. 

“Caliber?” Jeff took the bullet. 

“It’s a .45.” Tom put his hands in pockets. “Common police caliber.”

“I was just thinking that too. I’ve got a .45 on my hip right now.” Jeff sighed. “Is there any way that the bullet was lodged in his skull before the accident? You know, like service men with shrapnel embedded in their heads?”

“Well… there have been cases where people have survived shots to the brain and even in some extreme cases removing the bullet would have caused more damage so they just lived with the bullet, but…” He shook his head, “if you come over here and look at the skull.”

Jeff begrudgingly followed the coroner over to the body. 

Tom picked up the skull with gloved hands, “at the temperature at which the body was burned it damages bones. When bone gets heated it shrinks and checkers but you can see that the bullet entered the skull right between the eyes.” 

“God.” 

“Whoever shot this man was no stranger to firearms. This is sharp shooter quality. Anyway, if it’s a cop’s gun it’ll come up in IBIS.” 

Jeff held it up in front of his face and shook it. “Honestly? I’m kinda hoping it doesn’t.” 

**

_“So, I was thinking,” Stacy said, putting her hands up and blocking Sharon’s right hook, “if you’re so happily married why do you spend your Fridays, Saturdays and Sundays here?”_

_Sharon ducked a punch and landed a blow to Stacy’s collarbone. “I never said I was happily married.”_

_Sharon swung wide, leaving her stomach exposed and Stacy delivered an upper cut to Sharon’s ribs. Her ribs ached and her body begged her to stop but there was something therapeutic about her weekly jousts with Stacy._

_Sharon stumbled a little but never lost her stride. Stacy admired that about her, no matter how many times she was hit, Sharon never gave up first and she absolutely never went down._

_Sharon drew back and concentrated her might into one punch and caught Stacy in the temple. Stacy’s vision blackened for a moment and she tottered, not wanting to go down just yet._

_“You okay?” Sharon asked, stepping forward._

_Stacy lunged, catching Sharon around the waist and they both fell to the floor. Sharon looked up at her, stunned before they both broke down into laughter._

_“I pinned you.” Stacy said breathlessly._

_Sharon laughed again, “you cheated.”_

_“Yeah, well, you have to cheat every now and then.” Stacy purred._

_Sharon lay on her back, Stacy’s warm body covering hers. Their eyes were locked on each other until Sharon was aware that people were starting to look at them. “So, are you going to let me up?”_

_Stacy shrugged, “I guess.” She put her hands on either side of Sharon’s head and pushed herself up. Once on her feet she held out a gloved hand to Sharon._

_Sharon took the hand and stood up._

_“You done for the night or do you want to do one more?” Stacy wiped her hand across her brow, wiping away the sweat._

_Sharon looked at the clock and thought about the question for a moment. Her body was taxed and aching but if she was 100% with herself the last place she wanted to go was home. She pursed her lips before nodding, “let’s do one more.”_

_**_

_When Sharon let herself into the house she was relieved not to find Terry waiting up for her. She went to the laundry room and put gym clothes and towels directly into the washer and turned it on._

_Once in her bedroom she stripped out of her clothes and dropped them into the hamper before slipping into the bathroom. She turned on the water and let it warm up as she washed her face in the sink. She looked up into her reflection, made hazy by the growing steam._

_Sharon got into the shower and let the water run down her curves and soak her hair._

_The shower curtain pulled back and she let out a yelp. She squinted through the steam and still could only see the outline of the person without her glasses._

_“Are you cheating on me?”_

_“Oh jesus, Terry. You scared the shit out of me.” Sharon laid a hand over her heart. “It’s past midnight, what are you thinking?”_

_“_ Are you cheating on me, Sharon?”

“No. I’m not.” She scowled. 

“Then what the fuck were you doing all night?” He demanded. 

“I was at the gym.” Sharon sneered, “like every Friday night.” 

“Until midnight?”

“It’s a 24-hour gym… my trainer’s on swing shift.” She shivered. “Would you mind closing the curtain? You’re letting all the warmth out.” 

“You look me in the eye and tell me you’re not cheating.” 

“I just told you.” Sharon snapped, grabbing the shower curtain from his grasp, “I am not _cheating on you.”_

_“This time.”_

_“Yeah,_ this time _.” Sharon narrowed her eyes. “You know what I did and with who and how long. How long are you going to punish me? Why are you being so bi-polar about this? Can’t you just go see a shrink and stop pitching fits at me every time we’re alone?”_

_Terry scoffed._

_“Because I gotta say, with you acting like this it really doesn’t make me want to come home to you.”_

_“You took vows: to love, honor and cherish.”_

_“I love you! I cherish you!”_

_“But you don’t honor me?”_

_“What does that even mean?”_

_“It means don’t fuck other people when you’re married.”_

_“_ Jesus Christ _, Terry!” Sharon yelled in frustration, feeling tears prick her eyes. “What do you want me to do? You don’t believe me, you don’t trust me, what can I_ do _?”_

_“I don’t know.” He said, letting go of the shower curtain and letting it fall closed._

_She sank down in the shower and put her face in her hands, unable to stop sobbing. When the water ran cold she got up._

_She wrapped a towel around herself and walked into the bathroom. Her eyes were red and puffy, somewhat hidden behind her glasses. Terry laid on the bed on his side, facing away. She folded her arms across her chest and leaned against the doorframe of the bathroom._

_“Do you want me to leave?” She asked softly. “Do you want me to move out?”_

_“And go where? And do what?”_

_“I don’t know but we can’t keep doing this. You’re torturing yourself, you’re torturing_ me _and I don’t want to be here.” She took off her glasses and wiped at her eyes again._

_“If you left… when would you even see the kids?”_

_Sharon shrugged, “I don’t know… we’d figure something out…”_

_“Why don’t…” he sighed, “why don’t we try to figure out how to be together again?”_

_“I’d like that.” She said softly._

_“Are you coming to bed?”_

_“I just have to dry my hair.” Sharon retreated back into the bathroom. She shut the door and got her hairdryer out of the closet._

_She stood in front the mirror for a few long moments, wondering exactly when she’d become this person but she wasn’t anyone she found very likeable._

_Back in the bedroom Terry had already gotten under the covers and Sharon pulled on a set of pyjamas and climbed in on her side. Terry shifted closer, wrapped an arm around her and kissed her shoulder._

**

“I’m out of food.” Gavin announced, closing the refrigerator. “You’re probably starving. Do you want to come with me?”

“I’d just like to lie down actually. My ankle is bothering me.” 

“Of course,” he picked up his keys, “okay, any food allergies or dietary restrictions?” 

Sharon shook her head, “no, I’m not picky.” 

“Alright, spaghetti and red sauce it is. I’m not very culinary… that was my boyfriend’s department, I’m afraid.” 

“My husband does most… um, did most of the cooking…” Sharon sighed, “you know, people always talk in the present tense even after the person is dead… I always kind of thought I’d be more aware than that.” 

“You’ve been through a lot.” Gavin said sincerely, “I can’t even imagine the stress you’re under.” 

“To be perfctly candid,” Sharon sank down onto the couch. “I feel a lot of relief.” 

It was eerily easy to be around Sharon. She shared so little about herself and she was as much a stranger to him as the cashier at his favorite Chinese restaurant but he felt an inexplicable connection with Sharon. 

Sharon laid down on the couch, letting her eyes fall shut. It was quiet in Kennesaw, Georgia and she longed for the busy sounds of her New Orleans home. Despite the incessant quiet she easily fell asleep. 

**

_“Nice to have you home on a Saturday for once.” Terry wrapped his arms around Sharon’s waist and pulled her close._

_She smiled, “oh hello.”_

_He nuzzled her neck and sighed happily. “I’m going to make French toast.”_

_“My favorite…” She purred._

_He kissed her cheek and released her, walking towards the kitchen. She followed and grabbed the coffee pot and filled a mug while he set about making breakfast._

_Dylan came down and did a double take when he saw Sharon. “Mom… what are you still doing here?”_

_“Just spending time with my family.” She smiled._

_“Do you wanna go wake the munchkins?” Terry asked._

_“My pleasure.” Sharon stood and as she passed Dylan she kissed his cheek. Dylan protested and scowled at his mother. “I love you, deal with it.” She smiled._

**

She gasped awake when she heard the knock on the door. Heart pounding she pushed herself up off the couch and rubbed her tired eyes. Her brain started to turn off again, out of exhaustion before there was another knock, louder this time. 

“Fair Oaks PD, please open the door.” 

She stood up and winced when she put her full weight down on her ankle. It had turned out not to be sprained but it still hurt like hell. 

Sharon opened the door and stood face to face with Sheriff Jeff Bearden. “Hello, Captain.”

“Hello, Sheriff.” She let go of the door and sighed softly. 

“You know why we’re here?” 

Wordlessly she turned around and offered him her wrists behind her back. Jeff secured the cuffs on her wrist. “Sharon Raydor, you have the right to remain silent, anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to an attorney, if you cannot afford an attorney one will be provided to you. Have you heard and understood these rights as I have explained them?” 

“I understand.”


	5. Chapter 5

“Come on, Jeff!” Gavin barked at the Sheriff as he entered the small police department. “You arrest my client and you don’t call me?”

“Gavin, calm down.” Jeff put his hands up as he stood. 

“And don’t even act like you don’t have my number because you call me at least three times a week.” 

“She didn’t ask for a lawyer, she didn’t ask for you, she didn’t ask for her phone call and she hasn’t talked at all since she’s been here. In fact…” Jeff cast his eyes in the direction of the interview room. “She sat right down and fell asleep… I haven’t really had the heart to wake her. You can if you’d like.” 

“Oh, thanks. Make me the bad guy.” Gavin took off his glasses and rubbed his eyes, “what’s your case, Jeff?” 

Jeff picked up the bullet from his desk. “Her husband had a bullet in his brain. M.E. says that whoever shot him was a very good shot. Not only does Captain Sharon Raydor have a medal for marksmanship but the striations on the bullet were a match to her service weapon.” 

“Gunshot residue on her hands?” 

Jeff sighed and shook his head, “no, she was clean but that’s not conclusive. She’s a cop, she’d know how to clean herself up.” 

“There’s more here than we’re seeing.” Gavin insisted. 

“Has she talked to you?” Jeff asked, “‘cause she ain’t talkin’ to us. All I’ve got is the evidence. I don’t like the feeling of locking up another cop but everything I got is telling me she’s guilty as sin.” 

Gavin let himself into the interview room. Sharon was slumped over the table, breathing in and out with deceptive contentment. Gavin let his briefcase slam down onto the surface and Sharon startled awake. 

“I want you to keep your mouth shut, you’re not going to say anything to anyone other than me. You’re going to sit tight right here while I get you out and as soon as we’re alone you’re going to tell me what really happened.” 

Sharon squared her jaw and leaned back in her seat. Gavin could do nothing but accept it either as her consent or a challenge. Either way he was getting her out. 

**

_Sharon and Terry were sitting on opposite sides of the coffee table, Sharon with Jesse in her lap and Terry with Faith. In front of each pair was their half of the game Battleship._

_“See the ones I’m pointing at?” She asked Jesse, pointing at a number and a letter. He nodded. “Do you want to say it?”_

_“E7, dad!” Jesse called._

_“Oh! No! You sank our battleship!”_

_Faith frowned and Jesse stuck out his tongue at her. Faith grabbed one of the pegs and threw it at him. “Mom!”_

_“Hey, kids,” Sharon took the peg and handed it back to Terry. “Faith, you don’t be a sore loser. Jesse you don’t be a sore winner. And absolutely no throwing things. Capishe?”_

_“Ca-_ what _?” Faith giggled._

_Sharon’s phone rang and she reached for it, earning a very aggrieved sigh from Terry. “Shar, don’t answer that, come on.”_

_“It’s work, Terry.” She picked Jesse up and deposited him on the floor next to her and got up to grab her cell from her purse. She accepted the call and walked into the other room._

_“Here we go, sweetie.” Terry hoisted Faith up and set her on the floor. “Why don’t you and your brother go play upstairs.”_

_Faith cast a look at Sharon and Jesse took her hand, “let’s go play with my legos.”_

_Terry walked up behind Sharon. Sharon stepped a few paces away from him, “okay, yeah, I know where that is. I’ll meet you there in fifteen.”_

_“Oh goddamnit, Sharon.” Terry sighed heavily as she ended the call._

_“The only way I could take the day off is if I stayed on call.” She pocketed the phone and started for the door to get her shoes on. “We’ve got a really big bust about to go down. I thought it was going to be tomorrow but they forced our hand and it’s going down now. I really have to go.”_

_“I was so stupid, I was so fucking stupid.” Terry rolled his eyes. “Here I thought you could put your family first but you obviously can’t.”_

_“I took an oath, Terry.” She grabbed her holster and strapped it around her waist. Her gun remained locked up in the trunk of her car but always brought in her holster. “I was a cop before I was a wife and mother. I was on the promotion track when we met._ you knew this going in _.”_

_“Excuses.” He shook his head._

_“I should be the one bitching at you for being such an asshole about this whole thing.”_

_“I just want you to spend time with the family and_ I’m _an asshole?” Terry demanded._

_“I don’t want to fight with you, Terry.” Sharon snapped, “we had a great day, I loved hanging out with you and the kids but now I have to go arrest a ring of dirty cops.”_

_“Stop running away from me,” He grabbed her by the upper arm._

_She yanked her arm away from him, “I am not running! I have a fucking job to do, Terry!” She opened the door, “and now I’m going to be late.”_

_Before Terry could respond she slammed the door in his face._

_“Daddy?” Faith called from the top of the stairs._

_“Go play with your brother, sweetie.” Terry said softly, rubbing his tired eyes. “Daddy needs a minute…”_

**

“I couldn’t get you a bail hearing until tomorrow.” Gavin announced, walking back into the interview room and sitting down at the table. 

Sharon stood up from the table and walked over to the door and knocked. A uniformed officer opened the door, “ma’am.”

“I’d like to go a cell, please.” 

“Sharon!” Gavin snapped, “what is your problem? I’m trying to help you.”

“I never asked for your help.” She said softly as the guard led her away. 

Gavin walked out of the room again in confusion and frustration and up to Jeff’s desk. “Ooh, that woman!” 

“No shit, right?” Jeff laughed a little, “I’d love to get her into the department poker game.” 

“I have a feeling she’d take you for everything you’ve got.” 

“Yeah, probably… face and figure like that though? Not sure I’d mind.” 

Gavin crossed his arms across his chest, “always thinking with the wrong head.” Gavin teased. 

“Hey, I’m not the one who gave up my career because I got broken up with.” 

“Let’s not get into this.” Gavin sighed and rubbed his forehead. “Can I go back and see her?”

Jeff shook his head, “nope. She asked to be alone.” 

“Did she ask for her phone call?”

“Nope.” 

“Alright. If she asks for her phone call buzz me. I want to know.” 

“You got it.” Jeff nodded, “but I think we both know she’s not going to ask for her call. Where are you going to be?”

“I’m going home. I’m going to prepare for her bail hearing.” 

“What are you going to lead with?”

“Decorated officer, spotless record, mother of three.” Gavin shrugged, “that has to count for something.” 

“Alright, good luck.”


	6. Chapter 6

Bullet Found In Man’s Skull, Wife Arrested 

Brenda read down the article again as she bit into her cinnamon bun. She wiped crumbs and glaze from her lips with a napkin and set the article down before picking up the previous one. Before today she was assigned to a case and couldn’t get away. 

Today, however, she wouldn’t be missed – and if she was missed, so much the better. 

After retiring from the CIA and moving back to Atlanta to be closer to her aging parents, she joined up with the Atlanda PD. There a combination of her federal/outsider background and her gender she was not welcomed with open arms. Despite – or perhaps because of – coming in as a Deputy Chief, her superiors were loath to give her good assignments. 

Today, she was going to drive up to Fair Oaks and meet the infamous Sharon Raydor: short on words, long on dead husbands. 

**

“No, not a chance.” Gavin fixed his hands on his hips and gave Brenda a flat, unwavering glare, not even glancing at her badge. 

“I’m not here to hassle her, I just want to talk to her.” 

“She doesn’t talk to people.” Gavin sighed, “even if I let you in here she’s not going to talk to you. She is the very strong and very silent type, Chief Johnson, I’m sorry you wasted a trip.” 

“If she’s not going to talk to me anyway, why don’t you let me in?” Brenda smiled. 

“En-oh. _No_!” 

Brenda huffed, “can I at least use your bathroom?” Gavin regarded her suspiciously. “I had a Venti caramel macchiato on the drive up here and it’s either the bathroom or the azaleas.”

“Alright, come in.” Gavin stood aside, “it’s the first door on the right.” 

Sharon came out of the spare bedroom. “What’s the excitement out here?” 

“Captain Raydor,” Brenda held up her badge, “I’m Deputy Chief Brenda Leigh Johnson with the Atlanta PD. I’d just like to talk to you for a few minutes.” 

“Sharon, you don’t have to talk to her.” 

“Deputy Chief from Atlanta?” Sharon crossed her arms across her chest. 

“That’s right.” 

“Which division?” 

Brenda heaved a sigh, “I’m currently buried in vice.” 

“You’re not here in an official capacity…” 

“No, I’m not. Call it personal curiosity.”

“Alright.” Sharon opened the door to the spare bedroom. “Come on in.”

“Sharon, as your attorney, I’d like to be present for this conversation.” 

Sharon gave Gavin a long look. “I can handle myself, thank you, Gavin.” 

Brenda pulled the door shut behind her and Sharon sat on the bed, watching her. Brenda looked up and caught Sharon’s eye and faltered a bit. “Uh,” she opened her notebook in which she’d taken notes. “I just want to verify a bit of this information.” 

Sharon nodded minutely. 

“Okay, you and your husband were on a vacation to go camping on Kennesaw mountain.” Brenda looked up and Sharon nodded. “Um… there was a bullet found in your husband during the post-mortem and it matches your service weapon.” Sharon nodded again. “Despite the damning evidence you maintain your innocence.” 

“I maintain that I am ‘not guilty.’” Sharon corrected. 

“Okay,” Brenda pulled the pen out of her pocket and made a correction. “And I see you’re not wearing your wedding ring.” 

“I lost it last week.” Sharon said, “at the gym.” 

“You might want to borrow one for the trial if you want to look ‘not guilty.’” Brenda noted, “juries notice things like that. Also, you have two children and they’re staying with-”

“I have _three_ children.” Sharon snapped, “the newspaper left out my oldest because he wasn’t Terry’s, he’s from my first marriage.” 

Brenda took note of the snarl in Sharon’s voice and was more than a little taken aback. “And they’re all staying with Terry’s parents…” 

She nodded, “that’s right.” 

“Were you and your husband having marital difficulties?” 

“Why do you ask?”

“Apart from the fact that he ended up dead with a bullet in his brain before his body was burnt to a crisp? You have a yellow bruise on your cheek that would have predated your accident.” 

“I kickbox.” Sharon pursed her lips. 

Brenda started making notes again and lost grip on her pen. She scrambled to pick it up and pushed her glasses up her nose. 

“Do I make you nervous?” 

“Um, maybe a little, but… no, it’s just… you don’t have a creole accent… I wasn’t really expecting you to be so… _elegant_ and the newspaper photos didn’t do you justice at all…” 

Sharon furrowed her brow, glanced down at what she was wearing and then back at Brenda and burst into laughter. Brenda laughed uncomfortably while Sharon’s laughter subsided. 

“You remind me of someone.” Sharon said, leaning back against the pillow on the bed, lessening the defensive posture she’d taken on originally. “You’re bold and you’re beautiful.” 

“Thank you.” Brenda blushed and ran her fingers through her hair, looking down at her notebook in an attempt to hide her blush. “You’re very beautiful too.” 

“Do you have any other questions for me?”

“Your oldest child? What about his father?”

“Deceased.” 

“Under what circumstances?”

“Gunshot.”

Brenda’s eyes widened. 

“He was killed in the line of duty, he was a police officer in Los Angeles.” 

“That’s where you’re from.” Brenda said and Sharon nodded. “That’s why you don’t have a New Orleans accent…”

Sharon smirked. “Anything else?” 

Brenda looked over her notebook and furrowed her brow as she looked it over again. She sighed, “I don’t know. I just don’t feel like these details add up.” 

“Well, they’re all true.” 

“I believe that. I do.” Brenda closed her notebook, “I just feel like the details are trying to make two and two equal five.” 

Gavin knocked on the door, “Sharon, I’m not kidding, I don’t want you to have conversations with the police without me.” 

“That’s okay,” Brenda stood up, “I was just leaving.” 

“Would you like to come back and see me sometime?” 

Brenda shyly tucked a lock of hair behind her ear and smiled, “sure, Captain.”

“You can call me Sharon.”

“Alright… Sharon.”

“I’ll show you out.” Gavin said pointedly, putting his hand on Brenda’s back and turning her toward the door. They disappeared and Gavin returned a few moments later. He looked at Sharon and put his hands on his hips. 

“I didn’t tell her anything you don’t know.” 

“But you sure told it to her a whole lot faster.” 

“It’s all been in the newspaper.” Sharon furrowed her brow. 

“All this time fighting you for every little detail and all along all I had to do was wave a pretty blonde in your face.” 

Sharon scowled. “You don’t know me. You don’t anything about me.” 

“That becomes increasingly clear.” 

**

_Terry poured himself another cup of coffee and stifled a yawn. He had expected Sharon to be a while but it was pushing 3:30. He was a weird combination of exhausted and geared up; he was ready for a fight but he definitely needed the caffeine._

_Halfway through his coffee he heard the front door open and the tell tale jingle of keys dropping gently onto the entryway table._

_Terry walked out into the living room and flipped on the light._

_“God.” Sharon jumped, “what are you doing up? It’s almost four!”_

_“I was waiting for you.” He set the coffee down and strode up to her. “It’s really late… tell me, exactly how long does it take to arrest a couple of cops?”_

_“It’s not just arresting them. First it’s getting there, arresting them, mirandizing them, transporting them, booking them and then enough paperwork to smother an elephant.”_

_“And the paperwork couldn’t wait?”_

_“I wanted to just get it done. I figured you’d be in bed.” Sharon put a hand on her hip._

_“Why don’t you just tell me his name? Who are you fucking this time?”_

_“_ No one _!” She hissed. “And would you keep your voice down? Our children are trying to sleep up there and they have school tomorrow morning.”_

 _“_ Our _children and_ Dylan _.”_

_She held up a hand, “don’t do that.”_

_“Why not? You don’t listen to the things I tell you not to do… don’t work so late, don’t go to the gym until all hours, don’t_ fuck _other people.”_

 _Sharon growled, “I am going to tell you this_ one more time, Terry… _” She started in a menacingly soft voice, eyes narrowed, nostrils flared, teeth bared. “I had_ one _stupid affair. It is_ over _\-- and if you don’t start getting over it immediately, I am walking out of that door and I am never coming back.”_

 _“That is_ rich _. I should be the one threatening to leave_ you _.”_

_“So do it.” She motioned to the door, “there’s the door, Terry: walk out.”_

_They stood in the entryway tensely, staring each other down until Sharon scoffed. “Just what I expected. You don’t have the_ balls _to leave me. I’m going to bed.”_

_She started to cross the living room and Terry followed behind her, seething with anger. “Hey, Sharon,” he whispered._

_“_ What _?!” She whipped around just in time to see the spine of her Los Angeles Cityscapes coffee table book coming toward her face._

_The book slammed into her cheek bone and knocked her glasses off her face. Sharon yelped and stumbled, feeling her vision blackening a little bit. Her face throbbed but as soon as her vision came back she was seeing red._

_She launched herself at Terry and knocked him off his feet. His back hit the edge of the couch and he winced before they both landed on the floor with a thud. Sharon’s fist slammed into his face before he got a chance to process what had just happened._

_He thrashed, trying to knock her off of him to no avail. He lashed out and hit her in her cheekbone again. She hissed in pain and pulled back, giving him the opportunity to scramble to his feet._

_Sharon was on her feet in a second, her fingers gripping the offending book and grabbed him by the lapels. He froze, catching the incensed glare in her eyes. She held the book at the ready, her arm cocked back._

_A door opened upstairs and both of the adults froze. Sharon held her breath, grateful that they were hidden from view from the landing of the stairs._

_“Mommy?” Faith called from the top of the stairs._

_“I’m here, baby.”_

_“What happened?”_

_“I just got home… It was dark and I tripped.” She lied._

_“You okay?”_

_“She’s fine.” Terry answered._

_“Daddy, will you tuck me back in?” Faith took two steps down the stairs._

_“I’ll be right up, Faith, okay?”_

_“Okay.”_

_Sharon sighed softly and let go of his shirt collar and flexed out her fingers. They were sore from clutching him so tightly and she took a step back and tossed the book onto the couch. She held up her hands in resignation and walked to the entryway._

_She dug around in her purse until she found her spare glasses and put them on and grabbed her keys as quietly as she could and slipped out of the front door._

_Terry let out a breath. A fist fight with his wife was_ not _a fair fight. Even if he started training immediately, she’d still have about 10 years more boxing experience on him. He’d gotten a few lucky punches in but she had come very close to tearing him a few new ones._

_He wiped at his mouth and came away with blood: a split lip and a sore jaw. All-in-all he was lucky to get off so light. He grabbed a tissue and blotted his lip._

_**_

_Sharon pulled up to the gym and cut the engine. She jumped out, walking quickly to the front door._

_Just as she was about to open, it opened in front of her to reveal Stacy. “Oh. Sharon.”_

_“Hi…”_

_“I’m just getting off my shift…”_

_“I…” Sharon bit her lip, “I didn’t come to work-out… per se… I came to see you actually.”_

_“Oh?” Stacy quirked a grin._

_“I was hoping we could go somewhere.”_

_“Mm… your place or mine?”_

_“_ Yours _. Definitely yours.”_

_“Riiight.” Stacy grinned, slinging her gym bag over her shoulder. She pointed to Sharon and clicked her tongue. “Husband.”_

_“I… don’t want to think about my husband right now.”_

_“Don’t worry… I’ll make you forget_ all _about him…”_

**

“Hey,” Gavin sighed, finding Sharon perched on the balcony. She didn’t turn to look at him. “Hey, I’m sorry I snapped at you.” 

“Whatever…” she whispered, staring out into the field beyond Gavin’s house. 

“No, no,” he sat next to her. “I get it. She’s cute. I mean _I_ wouldn’t hit that but whatever floats your boat. I haven’t been with a woman since a very disappointing prom night.” 

Sharon snorted a laugh. “I’m not mad you. I just…” she drew her legs up to her chest and rested her head against her knees. “I miss my kids. My mother-in-law won’t let me talk to them.” 

Gavin put a supportive arm around Sharon and gave her a little squeeze.


	7. Chapter 7

Gavin opened the door to see Brenda smiling at him in the mid-morning Georgia sunshine. He sighed, “you again.” 

“The jury selection is looming on the horizon and I can help.” 

“Look, lady!” Gavin puffed up his chest. “I was a prosecutor for fifteen years! I can select a jury.” 

“You can call me Chief, Chief Johnson, Brenda, but you call me ‘lady’ one more time and I’ll take you down.” 

Gavin scoffed and crossed his arms, “you and what army?”

“I’ve seen you open a jar of pickles. She wouldn’t need an army.” Sharon teased. 

Gavin jumped. “ _Please_ stop sneaking up on me.”

“I was a profiler with the CIA, Mr. Baker, I can be an asset to you.” 

“Well, ask the boss,” Gavin hooked his thumb at Sharon. 

“Gavin, would you excuse us for a moment?” Sharon asked, squeezing out beside him and stepping out onto the front porch with Brenda.

“I advise against it but I know you’re going to do it anyway, so… _sure_ why not?” He closed the door, leaving the two women alone. 

“Hi,” Brenda said shyly, tucking her hair behind her ear. She wanted to kick herself for going to pieces whenever she saw this woman – but damned if she wasn’t undressing her with her eyes. 

“When I asked if you’d come back and see me… I _meant_ in a personal capacity.” 

Brenda nodded, “I figured but I think that you’d really benefit from my experience.” 

“I’m not asking for help.” Sharon said simply. “You and Gavin seem to have this idea in your heads that I _need_ help… and I don’t.” 

“There’s no shame in asking for help.”

“I have no problem asking for help _when I need it_.”

“With all due respect, I don’t think you understand the severity of the situation that you’re in.” Brenda furrowed her brow. 

“Chief Johnson,” Sharon started, touching her arm, “I have every faith that you are an incredibly smart person, I believe with my whole heart that you are an _excellent_ cop, I _really_ do… but I just want to sleep with you.”

“Well think of it as foreplay.” Brenda batted her eyelashes. “You scratch my back, I scratch your back.” 

“Fine.”

“Can I just say… you’re rebounding very quickly.”

Sharon crossed her arms across her chest. “When I married my husband, I loved him very much but over the years we became very different people. People who could not see eye to eye on anything; people who despised each other. We had differences that could never be overcome and I haven’t loved him in a long time..”

“Wouldn’t divorce have been simpler?” Brenda laughed.

Sharon shot her a glare that very quickly conveyed that Brenda had said the wrong thing. Truthfully, she’d known it as soon as it had come out of her mouth but the icy daggers that Sharon was shooting at her told her that she might have possibly destroyed any progress she may have made. 

**

_Sharon woke up slowly, her cell phone alarm hadn’t gone off and she’d slept in for the first time in she didn’t know how long._

_Soft lips covered Sharon’s. Sharon smiled against those lips, running her fingers through auburn curls. Sharon shifted against the naked curves that were pressed deliciously against her own. Stacy’s hand travelled down Sharon’s side and slipped between her legs._

_Sharon gasped out a moan when she felt Stacy push three fingers into her. Sharon hiked her leg up over Stacy’s thigh so that she could push even deeper. “God…”_

_Stacy’s arm wrapped around her middle suddenly made her feel very stable. Stacy’s fingers pushed deliciously into every perfect spot. Sharon ground her teeth, trying to stave off her orgasm, never wanting to stop feeling so good._

_Sharon reached between her legs, holding Stacy in place, bucking her hips hard. Stacy panted, whispering sweet nothings in Sharon’s ear, bringing her closer and closer to the edge._

_“Please… please…” Sharon moaned, rolling her hips._

_Stacy’s palm ground against Sharon’s clit and she gripped Stacy tightly and cried out as her body spasmed. Stacy kissed across Sharon’s heated skin._

_After several silent moments, Sharon grinned, “good morning.”_

_“Good_ afternoon _.” Stacy corrected, “it’s almost three-thirty.”_

_“Oh god!” Sharon propelled herself up. “I have to get home.”_

_“You’re going home?” Stacy asked, incredulity creeping into her voice. “Why do you want go home?”_

_“Have to, Stacy, not want to.” Sharon said, pulling her underpants on and hunting around for her bra. “I’m not a free woman. Maybe I can come back later?”_

_“_ I _have to work.” She grinned._

_“Then I’ll drop by and fight you.”_

_“Looking forward to it.”_

_“Okay, I give up. Have you seen my bra?” Sharon asked with a little exasperation. Stacy reached under the pillow and tossed it to her. She giggled. “Oh, you think that’s funny, don’t you?”_

_**_

_Sharon slipped into the house around four and crept quietly to the kitchen. She wanted to meet the bus, kiss her kids and leave again. She opened the freezer and pulled out a bag of frozen corn and held it to her eye._

_“You’re home early.” Dylan said, walking into the kitchen._

_“Keep your voice down.” Sharon lowered the corn._

_“What happened to your eye?”_

_“I finally lost a boxing match.” Sharon smirked, lifting the corn to her eye again._

_“Just kick ‘em in the nuts, you’ll win every time.”_

_“I was boxing with a woman, Dyl.”_

_Dylan chuckled. “Lost to a girl?_ That’s _embarrassing, mom.”_

_“Where are the monsters? I didn’t hear the bus.”_

_“Bus hasn’t gotten here yet.” Dylan opened the refrigerator and grabbed a pepsi. “I got a ride from Aaron’s mother.”_

_“What are you up to this afternoon?”_

_Dylan tapped the date on the calendar magnetted to the surface of the refrigerator. “Got a soccer game.”_

_“Do you want me to take you?”_

_“Aaron’s mom’s still outside, she’s taking us. I just stopped by to grab my bag.”_

_“Maybe I’ll come and see the game!” Sharon smiled hugely. “I haven’t seen you play yet this season.”_

_“I appreciate the thought but… this whole you and me, mother-son thing… it’s just not really working for me.” He shrugged, “I stopped expecting you to show up to shit after you became at Lieutenant.”_

_“Dylan--!” Sharon objected._

_“I’ve gotta go, Aaron’s mom is waiting for me.” Dylan clapped Sharon on the back. “I won’t wait up for you.”_

_Sharon pouted and tossed the corn into the sink with a frustrated huff. Terry crept down the hallway and stuck his hands in his pockets. “Hey…”_

_She looked up and looked Terry up and down. He had a butterfly bandage holding together his split lip and his nose was swollen._

_“Your nose… uh, might be broken…” Sharon frowned._

_“Can we--”_

_Sharon held her hands up, “no, we can’t.”_

_“You didn’t even let me finish.”_

_“I don’t give a shit what you were going to say. We can do nothing.” Sharon snapped. “You hit me in the face with a book. I don’t care how_ angry _you were at me if you hit me again I will press charges.”_

_“Hey, you were definitely going to hit me with the book too!”_

_“But I stopped myself because people who aren’t_ assholes _don’t hit other people in the face with books.”_

_“Don’t kid yourself, you stopped because you heard Faith.” He hissed, grabbing one of Sharon’s arms._

_Sharon growled and yanked her arm away from his grasp._

_“You’re just as big of an asshole as I am – probably bigger – in fact, I’m pretty sure you_ made _me this big of an asshole. Your_ son _is an asshole. It’s_ you _, Sharon, you’re poison.”_

_“That’s a really shit apology.” Sharon scowled._

_“I’m sorry I hit you!” He snapped. “I’m really angry and I’m not sorry I’m angry but I’m sorry I_ hit _you.”_

_She shrugged, “whatever.”_

_“You’re not sorry you hit me?”_

_“_ No _.” She spat, “you hit me and I had every right to defend myself.”_

_The sound of small shoes on hardwood floors made Sharon and Terry both tense up and back away from each other._

_“Mom?” Jesse ran into the kitchen._

_She leaned down and held her arms out to him and he jumped into them. “Oh boy, you’re getting so big!” Sharon puffed, straightening out. “I bet you’re going to be taller than me!”_

_“Taller than Dylan?”_

_Faith walked into the kitchen and Terry scooped her up. Terry remained silent, holding Faith to him protectively._

_“I don’t know, Dylan’s father was 6’3” but maybe! Your dad’s pretty tall, too.”_

_“How tall are you, daddy?” Faith smiled at Terry._

_He sighed a little, “I’m 5’10,” princess.”_

_“Whoa, so Dylan’s dad is three inches taller than you?”_

_“Five, sweetie.” Sharon corrected, “there are_ twelve _inches in a foot.”_

_“Give me a kiss,” Sharon kissed Jesse’s cheek and leaned over to kiss Faith’s cheek. “I have to go back to work, but I’ll see you two before bedtime, okay?”_

_“Okay,” Faith and Jesse mumbled._

_Sharon felt a tug at her heart. Her children were so understanding. She wanted to stay but she couldn’t be around Terry and it hurt her that her children suffered for that. Something had to change in a hurry but there was nothing she could do right now._

_She set Jesse on the floor and put the corn back into the freezer and tried not to look back as she walked out the door._

_She opened her trunk and unlocked her lockbox and extracted her gun before she holstered it at her hip. As she was pushing the trunk shut she looked back to the window, expecting to see little faces peering at her through the front windows._

_It hurt that they didn’t watch her leave out the window anymore._

**

“If you’re looking for the Deputy Chief, she’s not coming today.” Gavin said as he set his briefcase down on the table, pulling Sharon’s attention away from the gallery. 

“I wasn’t.” 

“Bullshit.” He muttered under his breath. 

She smirked at him and gave him a little push. Sharon Raydor had seen the inside of a court room more times than she could possibly count but this was her first time at the defense table. Considering that she was facing considerable jail time, she was still composed and collected. 

Gavin was becoming increasingly unsure of whether it was a front or if she was having a break from reality. There were moments when he’d see a flash of pain or sadness in her eyes before she schooled her features again. It was also clear to him that whatever the circumstances that led to her current predicament, she did not miss her husband.

“All rise for the honorable Judge Julian Cox.” The bailiff announced as the aforementioned judge, all billowing black robes and stern expression, entered the room. 

Sharon stood fluidly with the rest of the room. The judge settled himself down in his seat slowly before giving the command for the court to seat themselves. 

“The State of Georgia versus Captain Sharon Raydor.” The judge’s associate announced, “the charge of murder in the second degree. Mr. Daniels, your opening statement, please.” 

The clean cut assistant district attorney stood up and moved to face the jury. “Ladies and gentlemen of the jury,” he began. Ordinarily, when there was a case where a wife killed her husband he had to stand in front of the jury and tell them to disregard the soft-spoken, unassuming, demure mother of three. Ordinarily, he became the bad guy who insisted that they hold a woman accountable who didn’t look like she could overpower a Yorkshire Terrier. 

Today, however, he had Sharon Raydor. Today, he had a woman in a stylish and expensive pantsuit who looked no more repentant than Bernie Madoff. He had a woman who had the strength, the means and the knowledge to kill someone. 

“Sharon Raydor murdered her husband.” He said very simply, sticking his hands in his pockets and giving the jury long, meaningful looks. He paused, allowing the weight of the sentence to settle onto the twelve people in the jury box. “The evidence against her is very straight forward. The defense is going to remind you every chance they get that she’s a decorated police captain and a beloved mother of three. The defense is going to try to distract you with emotions because this case is so straight forward. The only thing you have to do is listen to the _facts_ and vote with your conscience.” 

**

Brenda pulled up in front of Sharon’s Garden District home. She got out of her silver crown vic and looked up at the towering home with no small amount of awe. She approached the front door and began to turn over rocks in the hope of finding a hide-a-key. 

Letting herself into the spacious house with the borrowed key, she slipped it into her pocket and looked around. 

She stepped into the living room and pulled on a pair of gloves before she sifted through the papers on the coffee table. An electric bill, a couple of pieces of junk mail, drawings by children, a coffee table book about Los Angeles. 

She opened the book and flipped through a few of the pictures before closing it. She was about to get up and move on when she noticed a smear of blood on the binding of the book. She picked it up and examined it before taking a picture with her cell phone and setting it back down. 

Brenda ascended the stairs. The first bedroom belonged to a teenage boy, the next to a younger boy and finally a little girl’s bedroom. Brenda was about to close the door and abandon the top floor when a framed picture caught her eye. 

She lifted it off the wall and studied it. It was Sharon with her arms wrapped affectionately around a small girl and Brenda smiled down at the image. She’d known the brunette for a little over a week but something about seeing her – in person or in a photograph – made her heart flutter. 

She set the photo down on the bookcase and shut the door behind her. Obviously the second floor was for the children and she’d been looking for Sharon’s bedroom but at the top of the stairs she hesitated. 

She drummed her fingers on the railing of the staircase before she turned and entered the teenage boy’s bedroom. The son that husband and wife did not share. He had posters on the wall but no framed pictures of his loving mother or his departed father, no photographs at all. She’d been in more teenagers’ bedrooms during her years as a criminologist and the one thing they always had in common – whether the walls were pink or black, whether the posters were pop or rap – every single one of them had photographs. 

Back downstairs she followed the hallway to the kitchen and beyond it was the final bedroom. The bed was made, the laundry neatly contained in the hamper, everything tidy and in its place. On the wall was a photograph of Sharon and Terry from their wedding. Obviously neither of them would have suspected the way their marriage would have ended. 

She wasn’t sure what she’d expected to find but she felt disappointed as she exited the stately home. 

“Who are you?” 

Brenda looked up to see an older man standing in front of her car. She held up her badge, “Deputy Chief Brenda Leigh Johnson, Atlanta PD.” 

“Uh-huh. I was wondering if you all were gonna come down here.” He nodded. “I’m Richard Bordeaux. I live next door.” 

“Mr. Bordeaux, what did you think of Sharon Raydor and Terry Hanson as neighbors?”

“They were fine most of the time.” He crossed his arms across his chest. “You know, when she moved in it was just her and the boy. She didn’t socialize too much, I guess she gets tired of the taxpayers after a while. We have a block party every summer and she never came to it except when she married Terry. He’s a pretty friendly sort; he works from home so I’d see him around in the backyard or such.”

“You said they were fine most of the time?”

“Well,” he sighed, “I don’t like to say things I’ve got no business repeating… you never know someone’s circumstances and I wouldn’t want to make assumptions.” 

“If you’ve seen or heard something you should tell the police.” 

“It’s none of my business really but they’ve been fighting a lot recently. Different times of the day and all that. I could never really hear anything… I just always assumed it was just to do with every day marital discord, it wasn’t my business really.” 

“Did you ever hear anything get physical?”

He thought about it for a moment and shook his head, “no, the only other noise we’d hear all the time was the trunk.”

“The trunk?”

“She keeps her gun in the trunk – and with three kids in the house, that’s an admirable thing to do. Any of us would hear the trunk shut and we’d say ‘oh, there goes Sharon, off to work.’ Sharon and Terry are good parents, the kids are always happy – except maybe the older boy, but he’s a teenager, they don’t know how to be happy.” 

“Is there anyone in the neighborhood who was closer Sharon?”

He shook his head, “she wasn’t real social.” 

“Thank you.” She dug her card out of her pocket, “if you think of anything else would you call me?”

He nodded and looked the card over for a moment. “Damn shame, what happened.”

“Oh, one last thing, the car in the driveway,” she pointed to a metallic blue crown vic. “Do you know which member of the family this car belongs to?”

“That’s hers. Don’t all you cops drive those?” 

“Thank you.” 

“Welcome.” 

Brenda watched the old man walk away before she got back into her car to fight with her gps. Next stop was the NOPD. 

**

_“Hey,” Sharon purred, walking into the locker room._

_Stacy looked up from stacking towels and grinned, “hey.” She crossed her arms across her chest and gave Sharon an appreciative once-over. “Come by for a workout?”_

_Sharon nodded, “something like that.”_

_“Well,” Stacy ran her finger down the front of Sharon’s blouse. “Why don’t you strip down and meet me in the shower?”_

_Sharon shucked off her clothing at breakneck speed, shoving the garments into a locker. She heard one of the showers turn on and her heart started thudding in her chest._

_Last night her actions could be blamed on adrenaline and spite. Today this was a calculated, rational decision. He thinks I spend my days fucking other people anyway why bother trying to fight it?_

_She stepped into the shower area, the steam from hot water rising off the tiles. Stacy’s alabaster skin in vibrant contrast to the cerulean tiles, her black hair matted to her shoulders by the falling water._

_Sharon wrapped her arms around the other woman, pushing her up against the cool tile and capturing her lips in a kiss. Stacy’s fingers dug into her arms as she dragged her closer, slipping a muscular thigh between Sharon’s._

_Sharon moaned and slipped her hand between them to slide her fingers through Stacy’s slick folds._

_“Oh god…” Stacy moaned in Sharon’s ear._

_Sharon ground into Stacy’s thigh as she pushed three fingers into the other woman. Stacy clutched Sharon’s ass with both hands, pulling her harder against her thigh. The sounds of their ragged breaths and the pounding of the water mingled in the small, echoing space._

_“Oh fuck,” Sharon gasped, bucking her hips erratically as she felt her orgasm nearing. Stacy dragged her fingernails up Sharon’s ass, riding Sharon’s fingers, her own climax imminent._

_The women buried their faces in each other’s hair to muffle their moans. Sharon brought her hands up to cup Stacy’s cheeks as she kissed her deeply._

**

The desk sergeant looked at Brenda with skepticism. She wasn’t sure if his hesitation was because she was a woman or because he was too courteous to dish on Sharon or some other reason entirely. 

“I’m trying to help her.” Brenda insisted, waving her badge again. 

He sighed heavily. “Take the elevator to the third floor, IA’s on the left.” 

“ _Thank you_.” She was sure to lay on the sarcasm thickly. “You’ve been so helpful.” 

She rode the elevator up with a couple of uniforms who ignored her valiantly. They got out on the second floor and when the doors slid closed Brenda closed her eyes. She imagined that she must have a sign taped to her back that said “I USED TO BE A FED, WHATEVER YOU DO DON’T TRUST ME OR ACKNOWLEDGE THAT I EXIST.”

She stepped out into the hallway on the third floor. To the right were the administrative offices and to the left was a smoked glass door baring the words INTERNAL AFFAIRS. At least the desk sergeant had had the good sense not to be intentionally misleading. 

She pushed open the door. The hallway had been so quiet and calm and the offices for Internal Affairs was so chaotic. She grabbed the first person who walked by her by the arm and held up her badge, “I need to talk to the person in charge.” 

He hooked his finger toward an office with an open door. She let him go and he went on his merry way. As she passed through the doorway she saw the lettering on the door bore Sharon’s name but a man looked up at her from behind the desk. 

“Can I help you?” He furrowed his brow. 

He didn’t look very old, probably no older than 35 if he was a day. She held up her badge as she sat down in the seat across from him, “I’m Deputy Chief of the Atlanta PD, Vice Division, and I need to ask you a few questions about your predecessor.” 

“My predecessor?”

“Captain Raydor?”

“She’s coming back, isn’t she?” 

“Well, that is the question of the hour, isn’t it?” Brenda flashed a charming – and slightly smug – smile at the young man. “May I have your name?”

“Oh, sorry, Lieutenant Emerson.” He held a hand across the desk to shake with her. “I’m sorry it’s a zoo in here but a couple of weeks ago we took down a whole ring of crooked cops and we’re still dealing with the fallout. I’m sure if Captain Raydor were here it would be a whole other story. She rules with an iron fist.” 

“So, would you say she’s not very well liked?”

“I don’t know, would you say you like the Internal Affairs officers in your precinct?” He laughed a little, getting a little more at ease. 

“I guess I can’t say I do.” She smiled back. You catch more flies with honey, as her mother was so fond of reminding her. 

“We like her though. She’s great at keeping order. As you can probably tell that’s not really our strong suit.” 

It wasn’t really Brenda’s strong suit either. She looked around the room, Lieutenant Emerson had papers piling high on every surface and she could scarcely imagine what the room would look like neat. 

“Did Captain Raydor have a personal relationship with anyone in the NOPD?” 

“A _personal_ relationship?” He raised his eyebrows. “You know she’s married?” 

“And y’all haven’t heard of extra-marital affairs in New Orleans?” She cocked her head mockingly. 

Lieutenant Emerson flushed. “Uh…” he shook his head, “I don’t know, she’s my division captain… I don’t feel comfortable with this line of questioning, ma’am.” 

“So, to your knowledge she didn’t have a personal relationship with anyone?” She asked and he shook his head, “what about someone that she was friends with? Was there anyone she may have confided in?”

He paused. Brenda understood human emotion and psychology enough to know that he wasn’t digging into the recesses of his memory – instead he was trying to decide if he should divulge information on his beloved superior officer. 

“I’m trying to help her, Lieutenant.” She insisted. 

He lifted his gaze to meet his eyes. He wanted to trust her – he wanted too very badly. “Okay,” he said finally, “she might have been friends with Captain Alvarez.” 

“Why him?”

“He’s in narcotics and he and Captain Raydor worked together a while back to expose officers who were dealing on the side and they…”

“They what?”

“They were friends, I guess. They had lunch together a lot— after their case was over.” 

“Okay, you’ve been very helpful, Lieutenant Emerson. Where will I find narcotics?” Brenda asked, smiling as she stood.


	8. Chapter 8

_Sharon sat in her car in the driveway for a half an hour before she steeled herself enough to go in. She’d showered twice – once after fucking Stacy and once after fighting Stacy – but she still felt the other woman’s fingers on her skin, could smell her._

_She slung her purse over her shoulder and walked up the front steps and opened the door. She’d play it cool, she’d play it like this was any other day._

_Almost as soon as she was in the door, Terry walked up to her. “There’s laundry in the dryer, fold it when it comes out, it’s mostly the kids.’”_

_“Oh… kay.” She said, a little shell-shocked._

_“I’m going out with John and Rick from the firm. I’ll be gone for a couple of hours. Faith and Jesse go to bed at 8:30; sometimes I let them stay up and watch a movie if they don’t act up.”_

_“Got it.” Sharon nodded once, wondering if she’d stepped into the same house as she’d left only four hours ago._

_He leaned in then and kissed her cheek; it happened too suddenly for her to pull away._

_He grabbed his keys off the hook and disappeared outside. Sharon dropped her purse onto the table and turned to the living room. Faith was coloring meticulously in her coloring book and Jesse was watching a cartoon on tv._

_“Hey monsters,” Sharon sat down next to Faith on the couch and stroked her hair gently, “what are you coloring?”_

_“A tiger.” Faith smiled, eyes never leaving her work._

_“You’re sure you want to be a cop when you grow up? Not an artist?”_

_“Women can do it all, mom.” Faith insisted, “that’s what my teacher tells me.”_

_“Well she’s right, baby.” Sharon leaned down and kissed the top of her precocious four-year-old. “You can do anything you want, your destiny is in your hands. Same goes for you, Jess.”_

_“Huh?” He looked upon hearing his name spoken aloud._

_“What do you want to be when you grow up, Jesse?”_

_“Superhero, probably.” He nodded thoughtfully. “Probably Batman… ‘cause I already know I’m not from another planet like superman and I’m kind of afraid of spiders.”_

_“Didn’t Batman’s parents die?”_

_Jesse shrugged, “well, I wouldn’t really be_ Batman _.”_

_“I think you’d be a great superhero.”_

_The dryer buzzed and Sharon pushed herself off the couch. Admittedly, it had been a while since she’d shouldered any of the responsibility for the laundry and when she walked into the laundry room she saw that some of the things had been moved around._

_Had it really been that long? When did she get so out of touch? Was it irreversible? Did she even really have a place in this family that very clearly functioned perfectly well without her? Was it pure selfishness that she wanted to try? Would it be better for everyone if she walked away like Terry thought she should?_

_Terry had been such a good person when they’d met. He was trusting and he was loving; was she poison, had she ruined him? Did she ruin everything and everyone she cared about?_

_Would it be better for everyone if she just left?_

_She folded the laundry and headed for the stairs. Once she’d reached Dylan’s door, she knocked. She received no answer; she was met only with loud music. She knocked again, “Dyl! Open up! I’ve got your laundry.”_

_She waited and listened and heard no tell-tale sounds of approaching footsteps. She knocked once more before opening the door._

**

“Captain Alvarez?” Brenda called, hustling down the hallway after the tall, broad-shouldered man who had been pointed out to her as the captain she sought. 

“If this doesn’t have to do with the Mendoza Brothers case, I don’t have time.” He barked, continuing at his speedy pace. 

“It’s about Captain Raydor.” 

He skidded to a halt and Brenda nearly fell into him. He certainly was a handsome devil; he wasn’t really her type but she would’ve made an exception for this man. 

“Fine,” he said solidly, “we can talk in here.” 

The conference room he led her into was frigid; the air conditioning must have been maxed out. “What about her?” He asked as soon as he shut the door behind him. 

“What was the nature of your relationship with Captain Raydor?” 

“She’s a good cop.” He crossed his arms across his chest. 

Brenda nodded, “I know that. The information I was hoping to glean is how long you were having sex with her.” 

He pursed his lips and narrowed his eyes at her but didn’t bother denying it. They both knew that two officers of the same rank from different divisions were not _encouraged_ to fraternize but also were not sanctioned when they partook of each other. 

“I guess it was about six months.” 

“And who ended it?”

“She did.” 

“Why?”

“Said her husband found out.” 

“How did he find out?” 

Alvarez shook his head, “damned if I know.” 

Brenda studied his face. There was melancholy in his eyes even as his schooled features were screaming nonchalance. 

**

Sharon sat on the front porch of Gavin’s house. He was inside preparing yet another spaghetti and marinara dinner. 

She brought the cigarette up to her lips and took a long drag. She hadn’t touched a cigarette in almost twenty years – she’d given up the vice when she got pregnant with Dylan and had never picked them back up. 

She hadn’t ever craved a cigarette as badly as she had jonesed for one today, sitting in that courtroom, thinking of her three beautiful children. When she tried to force her mind to focus on the proceedings she found that she could only think of the sassy blonde deputy chief. 

Her guilt, her relief, her heartache, her revulsion, her lust, her desire. Every emotion she’d felt over the past month swirling around inside her, threatening the thin façade that was holding her together. 

Every single accusatory word uttered by the assistant district attorney, every disdainful look from the jury, every piece of damning evidence provided by the states’ witnesses… it all made her want a cigarette very badly. 

She blew out a puff of smoke and leaned back against the chair and stared up at the sky. 

Some small part of her knew that she should be doing more to enjoy what could very likely be her last days as a free woman. 

She heard a car door slam and she stood up to look over the railing. The flash of blonde hair made Sharon’s heart flutter and she sat back down, trying to erase the smile from her face. 

Brenda reached the top of the stairs and stood, watching Sharon for a moment. She held out her hand. Sharon dug into her pocket and pulled out the box of Marlboros and set them in Brenda’s hand. 

Brenda sank down onto the bench beside Sharon and pulled a cigarette out and put it between her lips. Sharon cupped a hand around the flame from the lighter and leaned in close to light the cigarette. 

After a long silence, Brenda asked, “how was the first day?”

Sharon shrugged, “you should ask Gavin. I wasn’t really paying attention.”

Brenda scoffed. “Is this hubris or insanity?” 

Sharon considered the question for a few long moments before answering, “I think it’s just defeat, plain and simple.” 

“You’re not down for the count yet.” 

“Not yet, but it’s just a delay in the inevitable.” Sharon stubbed out her cigarette in the ashtray Gavin had dug out of a box in the back of a closet. She crossed her arms across her chest in an attempt to keep herself warm in the rapidly cooling air of twilight. 

“I believe in you.” Brenda said simply, staring straight ahead at the darkening sky, toward the lights of the city beyond. 

Sharon turned to her. “Why?”

Brenda remained silent, she didn’t really have a specific answer to that question. In her years as a profiler she worked from her gut, she was almost never wrong. At last she said, “I went down to New Orleans today.”

“And?”

Brenda furrowed her brow, “Dylan doesn’t have any pictures up on the wall.” 

Sharon brought her hand up to her face, rubbing her eyes, hiding her face from Brenda. “He’s…” 

Gavin opened the door, “dinner’s ready – oh, Chief…” 

“Don’t worry, I’m not staying.” Brenda gathered up her gigantic purse as she stood.

“I made plenty. You’re welcome to stay.” Gavin held her gaze, hoping that it was clear that he was _asking_ her stay, trying to convey to her how much Sharon needed her there. 

She nodded, “thank you.” 

**

_Sharon stood against the doorframe of her bedroom and stared in at the man in the bed. She chewed on her thumbnail as she tried to bite back her feelings of revulsion._

_She watched the steady rise and fall of his chest and had to physically fight scowling in disgust._

_She let out an unsteady breath and closed her eyes. Walking back out into the kitchen she bit back the oncoming sob until she got to the living room. She lowered herself onto the couch, curling up with a pillow and pulling the afghan down onto her._

_Sharon covered her eyes and noiselessly started to cry when she couldn’t hold it off any longer. How had she let everything fall apart? How had things gone from bad to worse so quickly and what was there to do now?_

_What was there possibly to do now?_

**

“I didn’t think you were coming back.” Sharon admitted when they were alone again. 

“Why’s that?”

Sharon cast her eyes downward, “oh, no reason in particular. I’m sure my being an epic bitch is very charming.” 

Brenda smiled hugely, “you’re certainly epic… and you are a bit of a bitch… but you _are_ very charming.” 

Sharon reached out gingerly, her pinky finger very gently stroking Brenda’s for a moment before she hooked it around. 

Oh, there was something about this woman. Brenda found herself gladly falling headlong into Sharon Raydor. 

The last thing she wanted to do was ruin the tender moment but she hadn’t gotten answers to all of the questions she’d set out to put to bed today. “May I ask a sensitive question?”

Sharon hesitated before saying, “ _one_.” 

“How did your husband find out about you and Captain Alvarez?” 

“He broke into my briefcase and found my planner and some hotel receipts.”

Brenda took that in for a moment. “Had he broken into your briefcase before or do you think he suspected you were having an affair?”

“I did say one question,” Sharon smirked, “but I’m feeling generous. I don’t know why he broke into it… I thought I was so careful but you can’t account for everything. It’s just not possible. I don’t know. I mean, maybe he needed a pen and couldn’t find any. Maybe one morning I smiled too widely when I left for work.” 

She shrugged again, “I don’t know.” 

“I should let you get to sleep. You should probably try to pay attention tomorrow.” Brenda patted Sharon’s knee and stood up. 

“Will you come?”

Brenda turned around and looked down at Sharon. “Why did you really think I wasn’t coming back?”

Sharon nibbled on her thumbnail and turned away from Brenda. 

“Fine. You don’t have to tell me.” Brenda felt emboldened by Sharon’s sudden submission and she reached toward her, fingertips brushing softly over Sharon’s strong jaw. 

Sharon looked up, eyes glistening. Brenda cupped Sharon’s cheek more firmly and she stroked her cheekbone with the pad of her thumb. Brenda leaned down and pressed her lips to Sharon’s forehead. “I will see you tomorrow, beautiful.” 

Sharon gave Brenda’s hand a squeeze before they separated. Sharon watched the swing of Brenda’s hips as she passed Gavin on her way to the front door. 

Gavin entered the living room and sighed when he saw Sharon. Sharon wiped her eyes with the back of her hand and looked away. He stepped forward and clapped her on the shoulder. “Wanna try calling your kids?”

“My horrible mother-in-law says she won’t let me talk to them.” Sharon laid her head back against the back of the couch. “Besides, it’s late. They should be in bed.” 

“Like their mother.” Gavin grabbed Sharon by the arm and coaxed her up. “Just a heads up: tomorrow, every time you start zoning out I’m going to pinch you.”

“You wouldn’t dare.” 

“Try me.” Gavin deadpanned.


	9. Chapter 9

Sharon shifted in her chair, tugging at the hem of her blazer. The borrowed wedding ring on her finger had belonged to Gavin’s mother and it was at least a half size too small. 

“ _Stop fussing._ ” Gavin scolded. 

Sharon scowled and crossed her legs the other way. She felt a small hand give her shoulder a squeeze and when she turned around to see Brenda. 

“Just listen to Gavin and look attentive.” Brenda whispered. 

“Thanks, _mom_.” Sharon smirked, spreading her fingers out over the table. 

**

“Your next witness, Mr. Daniels?” 

“Thank you, Judge. The state calls Dr. Tom Wilkins.” 

Tom Wilkins approached the box and was sworn in before taking a seat. Gavin scrawled something on a piece of paper and pushed it over to Sharon discretely. 

When he shows the autopsy photos DO NOT LOOK AT IT \-- and think of something sad.

She glared at him out of the corner of her eye. 

“Can you tell me what we’re looking at here?” Daniels asked, leaning against the box. He glanced at Sharon who was playing a better game today than she had the day before. Sharon’s face was in her hands and her head was lowered. 

“This is Terrence Hanson’s skull at the time of my autopsy.”

“And what did you determine to be the cause of death?”

“Well, it’s impossible to say for sure, given the condition of the body but based on the evidence I determined that the shot was fired before the body was burned.” Wilkins indicated the bullet hole between the eye sockets. 

“How do you know that this happened before the fire?”

“There’s soot in the bullet hole. If the fire was out before he was shot then the hole would be clean.” 

“Thank you, no further questions.” Daniels smiled amicably at the judge and took his seat. 

“Your witness, Mr. Baker.” The judge said, taking notes on the testimony. 

“You said that the cause of death was inconclusive but you did rule it a homicide.”

“Yes, I did.” 

“Is it possible that Mr. Hanson died of a heart attack? Or a stroke? Or an aneurism?” 

“There’s no evidence to suggest that.” The M.E. shook his head. 

“But you said yourself that the condition of the body makes it impossible to pinpoint the cause of death, correct?” 

“Well, yes, but-” 

Gavin got closer to the image of the skeleton. “I’m not a doctor, so you’ll have to excuse my ignorance but can you remind me what this image is of?”

Daniels stood up, “objection, your honor, the good doctor has already answered that question.”

“I have a point, your honor.”

“Then get to it, Mr. Baker. Objection overruled.” The judge made a notation and then looked back to Wilkins, “Dr. Wilkins?”

“It’s the skeletal remains of Terrence Hanson.” 

Gavin pointed to the ribcage, “this is where the heart is, right?”

“Your honor!” Daniels stood again, rolling his eyes. 

“Mr. Baker, if you don’t get to your point in the next thirty seconds then I’m going to sustain the earlier objection.”

“Duly noted, your honor, thank you.” Gavin nodded to the judge and looked back to the m.e. “Is this where the heart is?”

“Yes, in a living person that’s where the heart is.” Wilkins confirmed. “That is just the skeletal remains.”

“So, what you’re saying is that you were unable to examine Mr. Hanson’s internal organs at the time of autopsy? You were not able to rule out cardiac arrest, aneurism or any number of other natural causes that could have killed Mr. Hanson?” 

“He was shot in the head, Mr. Baker.”

“ _Were you able to rule out natural causes?_ ” Gavin repeated forcefully. “Do you have any forensic proof that he was not _already dead_ when he was shot?” 

“Why would-”

“ _Yes or no_ , doctor.”

“No.”

“Could you clarify that for the court? _No, you are not able to rule out natural causes_?” 

“No, forensically, there is no way to rule out natural causes from these remains.” 

“Thank you, doctor. No further questions, your honor.” Gavin smirked to himself before resuming his seat. 

**

_Sharon pulled into the driveway and got out of her car. Terry emerged from the front door and walked down to meet her in the yard. “Sharon, where are the kids?”_

_Sharon slung her purse over her shoulder and smiled as sweetly as she could manage, “surprise. I sent them to your parents’ for the long weekend.”_

_“Without talking to me first?” He scowled._

_“I wanted it to be a surprise.” She insisted, stepping closer to him. “We’ve been fighting a lot lately and I think we need to get away – just us – for a little while.”_

_“Yeah?” He regarded her with skepticism._

_“Yeah,” Sharon nodded, “remember when we used to go camping? I thought that could be fun… like old times.”_

_“And the kids are…”_

_“On the train and will be picked up by your mother in an hour.”_

_**_

_The awkward silence between Terry and Sharon stretched on as the drive drew out. It would be night before they arrived and the sun hadn’t even started to disappear behind the mountains yet._

_Terry fussed with the radio for a while before turning it off, leaving them to drive in silence._

_Sharon fidgeted with the hem of her dress. It was too hot in the car to wear her cargo shorts but she realized she was more uncomfortable the way she was. Terry kept glancing at her out of the corner of his eye. His heart was beginning to pound, he wished that she would just stop fidgeting. He sighed inwardly._

_Sharon’s phone sprang to life, the ringer turned all the way up. They both jumped and Sharon pulled it out of her purse and looked at the caller id. _Stacy_. Sharon rejected the call and slipped it back into her purse. _

_Terry gripped the steering wheel harder. “Who was that?”_

_“Work.”_

_“Why didn’t you answer it?”_

_“I’m on vacation.”_

_“When has that ever stopped you?”_

_Sharon frowned, “I’m trying to be better, Terry.”_

_“No, it’s okay. We still have a ways to go.” He insisted. “Call them back.”_

_“No.”_

_“Come on, Sharon. Call them.”_

_“I don’t want to.”_

_“Why not?”_

_“I’m on vacation. I don’t want to talk about work. I don’t want any distractions.”_

_“That’s not ‘being better,’ that’s a complete personality change.”_

_“Fuck, Terry. Drop it.” Sharon snapped._

_“There’s my Sharon.” He said sardonically. “What the fuck is this all about, Sharon? What are you up to?”_

_“I’m not up to anything! I want to try and start over! I want to not hate my life anymore. I hate myself so much sometimes. I hate what we’ve turned each other into.”_

_“Now you’re going to try to blame everything on me? You’ve got a lot of fucking nerve.”_

_“I don’t want to talk about this right now. I don’t want to fight with you.” She grumbled, turning away._

_“It’s always about what you want…” he muttered to himself, his foot depressing the gas more and more. The car gained speed as it shot down the straight stretch of deserted road that connected the sprawling southern states together._

_Sharon looked over at the speedometer. “What are you doing?!” She demanded._

_“I just want the goddamn truth. Who was on the phone?”_

_“Work!”_

_“That is bullshit!”_

_“Terry! Please!” Sharon pleaded, trying to grip the dashboard._

_“Who was on the fucking phone? Who are you fucking this time?”_

_“You’re going to kill us both!” She screamed, “we have kids you selfish fucking asshole!”_

_“Tell me who you’re fucking and I’ll slow down. Don’t tell me and I keep speeding up.” Terry said calmly._

_Sharon panted. He was obviously having a break from reality and Sharon had no desire to play his game or to die but she realized she’d have to pick one._

_“My personal trainer.” She admitted with resignation. She felt a tear sliding down her cheek. “Stacy.”_

_“How long?”_

_“Just twice.”_

_“Don’t lie to me!”_

_He pushed down harder on the gas and Sharon’s tears fell freely. “I’m not!”_

_“Men, women, it doesn’t matter at all, does it? Anything to emasculate me.”_

_“It was never about you, it’s my weakness.” She swallowed hard. “I’m sorry I hurt you but you’ve always taken it too personally.”_

_“Goddamnit, Sharon!” Terry yelled, slamming his fists against the steering wheel._

_“Terry, stop this car, right now!”_

_“I’m done taking orders from you,” he snarled, reaching over and opening the glove compartment. The car swerved but Sharon’s attention was focused on the gun he was pulling from the glove compartment._

_“Jesus!”_

_Trying to keep his eyes on the road and point the gun at Sharon, the car started to swerve back and forth over the line. Sharon grabbed his wrist and pushed the gun up toward the roof of the car. He struggled against her and in the process lifted his foot from the accelerator._

_Terry was starting to get the gun pointed downward as they struggled. Sharon could have easily overtaken him if she’d used both hands but she was too busy trying to push the gun’s safety on with one and, with her other, unlock the car door._

_The car started decelerating rapidly as Terry struggled to maintain his grip on the gun and the steering wheel._

_Sharon got the door open and, weighing her other options for a moment – and the likelihood of wrestling the gun away from him – before propelling herself out of the open door. She tucked and rolled, rocks and hot sand stinging her as she skidded to a stop._

_She got immediately to her feet, not waiting to see what Terry was doing as she darted off into the cover of the woods._

_Terry fired once and she heard it ricochet but it didn’t hit anywhere near her. He was a terrible shot and she had a lot of training and if she could keep away from him long enough to get back to a nearby town she’d be home free._

_This was definitely the wrong outfit for the drive._


	10. Chapter 10

Gavin and Sharon were not happy with each other when they pulled into the parking lot on the third day. They stood alone in the conference room when Brenda let herself in.

“Good.” Gavin said with some relief. “I’m glad you’re here. Would you talk to your girlfriend? Make her listen to _reason_.” 

Brenda blushed a little. She grinned sheepishly when Sharon didn’t bother to correct him for whatever reason. “What seems to be the trouble, ladies?” 

“She won’t testify.” Gavin snapped, turning to look accusingly at Sharon who looked at him with disinterest. 

“Why don’t you want to testify?”

“I have every right not to testify. I’m a terrible witness. I’m not sorry my husband is dead and I can’t fake it for the jury.” 

Brenda heaved a heavy sigh. “I say listen to the woman.” 

“You guys are insufferable.” Gavin threw his hands up. “I don’t think you understand how you’re presenting to the jury.” 

“I don’t think you understand what a shit witness I’d be.”

“And what would you really be putting her on the stand to say?” Brenda reasoned. 

“How about: ‘I didn’t kill my husband and let me tell you the story of what really happened.’”

Sharon folded her arms across her chest and glared at him. “You put me on that stand and I will plead the fifth until I am blue in the face.” 

“Alright, whatever. It’s your life.” 

**

_Sharon huffed as she pulled herself up a steep incline using a root from a tree. She swiped the back of her hand across her brow, wiping away dirt and swear. How long had she been walking? She looked up to the sky, the sun was in the middle of setting – but what did that mean?_

_She reached the top of the incline and sank down onto a fallen tree. She had to come up with a plan. She could plunge on into the forest – but she didn’t know how deep the woods were, where they would come out or which direction to head. She could double back and go back to the road – but she’d be exposed and she didn’t remember where the last town they’d passed was._

_Sharon didn’t bother to think about the pain in her ankle; she had plenty to worry about without expending her energy on things she couldn’t change._

_One thing was for certain: one way or another, this was_ not _going to be the end of Sharon Raydor._

_She paused for another few moments before deciding to take her chances in the forest. Even if she encountered Terry in the woods, without the advantage of the car, she could out maneuver – or outwit him._

_The woods it was, big bad wolf be damned._

**

“Thank you, Dr. Evans. Can you please tell the court where and when you first met Captain Raydor?” 

“Yes, I met Captain Raydor the night that she was admitted to the hospital. After the nurse completed the physical examination I went in to speak with her.” 

“Do you recall what the two of you talked about?” Gavin asked. 

The doctor leaned back in the chair a little. “I just asked her for her name and where she was from and how she was.”

“And she said?”

“Nothing. She just stared at me and blinked but she never said anything.” 

“In your professional opinion, what would account for that odd behavior?” 

“Well, it’s quite common for people who’ve been in accidents to suffer from shock. In my opinion, Captain Raydor’s brain was refusing to deal with the trauma she’d just been through and the loss of her husband. Even now,” the doctor motioned to Sharon, “she’s visibly withdrawn. That’s consistent with post-traumatic stress which often comes after shock.” 

“What are some other symptoms of shock?”

“Dizziness, fainting, nausea, low blood pressure.” 

Gavin moved to the table and picked up the copy of the police report. “According to the police report, the first thing Captain Raydor did after she was discovered was faint and the sheriff notes that during his initial interview with her in the hospital she complained of nausea. Would you say that this signed statement by the sheriff supports your diagnosis?”

“Definitely.” 

“Thank you, doctor. No further questions.” Gavin took his seat at the defense table and gave Sharon’s hand a little squeeze. 

The prosecuting attorney stood to cross the doctor. Sharon drowned out the words as she stared in the direction of the witness stand, her mind a million miles away. 

The door to the court room opened and closed, catching Sharon’s attention. Her eyes moved to the back of the room where she saw the boy sink onto the bench. He looked around inquisitively and his eyes landed on Sharon and relief colored his features.

Sharon smiled at him, feeling overwhelmed. She turned back to Gavin and whispered his ear, “call a recess.” 

“What? Why?” 

“My son is here.” 

Gavin turned abruptly in his seat. Dylan had ducked behind other spectators, the room was packed and it was easy for him to sink into the shadows. 

“Counsel?” Judge Cox cleared his throat. 

Gavin turned back. “Sorry, your honor.” 

“Mr. Daniels, your witness.” 

“Thank you, your honor.” Daniels cleared his throat and shot Gavin a sidelong look before turning back to the sheriff. 

“Did you hear me?” Sharon hissed discreetly in Gavin’s ear. 

Gavin fumed and scrawled It’s almost noon, we’ll ask for lunch. Just shut up.

Sharon fumed and was considering asking for the recess herself when the prosecuting attorney took his seat and the judge banged his gavel. “Thirty minutes for lunch.” 

Sharon jumped up from her seat and the bailiff stepped toward her suspiciously. Gavin took Sharon by the shoulders and held her in place. Gavin turned and crooked a finger to Brenda. Brenda came forward, “Sharon said her son’s here, in the back. Bring him to the conference room?”

“He has longish dark hair, he keeps it in his face –” Sharon said. 

Brenda held her hand up, “I saw his picture,” she smiled, “I’m sure I can pick him out.” 

Sharon smiled gratefully at Brenda. For a moment Gavin felt a ridiculous pang of jealousy that that gratitude didn’t often seem to extend to him. He accepted that she was under a lot of stress and, of course, it didn’t hurt that she was painfully attracted to the deputy chief. 

Gavin closed the conference room door behind Sharon and turned a stern look on her. “Would you cool it?” Gavin growled, “when you’re in that court room do not speak unless you’re spoken to, do not jump up--”

“I’m not a child.” Sharon snapped. 

“ _Then quit acting like one._ ” Gavin and Sharon stood trying to stare each other down. 

There was a knock on the door and the two broke eye contact. The door opened and Brenda came in followed by Dylan. Dylan was decked out in a pair of acid wash skinny jeans and a hoodie bearing the logo of some punk band or another. Gavin took note that even though he had a nose ring and his hair obscured half his face the resemblance to Sharon was remarkable. 

Sharon held her arms out and Dylan rushed to her, folding into her arms. She leaned her cheek against his head, holding him tightly and tenderly stroking his hair. “I’m so glad to see you…” she breathed. “I love you _so much_.” 

He squeezed his eyes shut, a few tears rolling down his cheeks. “I love you too.” He hugged her tighter, afraid to let her go. 

She turned her head and whispered into his ear. Dylan listened intently and nodded. She pressed a kiss to his temple, keeping him in a protective embrace. 

Gavin felt his previous annoyance with Sharon melt away upon seeing the emotional display in front of him. Any and all preconceived ideas about who she was as a person faded away and he realized _this_ was who she was. This naked emotion and vulnerability told him everything he needed to know. She was fiercely protective, calm in the face of adversity and she loved with her whole heart. 

Gavin looked up at Brenda who was watching mother and son with a smile. He suddenly felt all the more determined to keep Sharon out of jail. 

Sharon took Dylan’s face in her hands, “Dylan, I want you to go back to Florida. I want you to go back--”

“Mom, no.”

“Dylan, please, listen to me. You shouldn’t be here, you have school.” 

“And what? A few days of classes are more important than being here for you? Fuck that. After what you’ve done for me I need to be here.” 

“You’re a sweet kid,” she stroked his hair soothingly again, “I appreciate the sentiment but I’d feel better if you were back with your brother and sister. They’re so young and I’m sure they don’t understand what’s going on.”

“I just want everything to be okay again.” Dylan admitted, biting back a sob. 

Sharon lowered his head to her shoulder and held him close. “So do I, baby. I am going to do whatever it takes to make things right. Okay?” 

He nodded, burying his face in his mother’s neck. 

Gavin found this behavior curious. As much as he had adored his own mother he couldn’t imagine himself trying to climb into her arms like Dylan appeared to be doing. Sharon was certainly in deep shit but wouldn’t a seventeen year old boy try to be strong for his mother? Wouldn’t it be typical for a boy his age to step up and be ‘the man of the house’ and comfort her? 

Sharon kissed his forehead a couple of times before he lifted his head. 

“I want you to go with Chief Johnson, she’s going to take you to the bus station.” Sharon insisted, despite the look of protest on the boy’s face. “She’s a good friend of mine and she’s going to make sure you get there safely so I don’t have to worry about you.” 

“Mom--”

“Dylan, _please_. Do this for me.” Sharon said pointedly, smoothing his black hair down. “ _Please_ , sweetheart.” 

He reached up and took her hand, giving it a squeeze, “okay, mom.” 

Sharon smiled. She looked over at Brenda, “Brenda? Do you mind seeing him to the bus station?” 

“Not at all.” 

With a final sidelong look at his mother, Dylan followed Brenda out and she closed the door behind them. Sharon sank down into a chair. 

Gavin put a hand on Sharon’s back. She closed her eyes and covered her face with her hands, feeling overwhelmed and over taxed. Gavin didn’t really know what to say so he just stuck with “what do you want for lunch?” 

“I’m not hungry.” She murmured. 

“Come on, Shar, you have to eat.” 

“I said I’m not fucking hungry!” She snapped, pushing his hand away, “don’t touch me!”

He held his hands up defensively, stepping away from her. 

“And can you leave me the fuck alone for five fucking minutes? I never have any fucking time to myself.” Sharon growled. 

“Alright, your majesty.” Gavin rolled his eyes as he stepped out of the room. 

The bailiff regarded him suspiciously. “I’m just going to get a cup of coffee.” Gavin said, “she’s cooling her heels in there. She’s not going anywhere.” 

On his way out of the court house, toward the food carts on the sidewalk, ADA Daniels fell into stride with him. “Didn’t figure you were a sucker for lost causes, Baker.” 

Gavin gave Daniels a weary look. “She’s innocent.” 

“You really believe that, don’t you?” Daniels laughed. “If I ever shoot someone in the head without remorse I want you to be my lawyer. Actually, no, no I don’t – because you’re going to lose this case.” 

Gavin ignored him and went to stand in line for coffee. 

“Hey, come on,” Daniels insisted, “don’t be like that. When I first joined the DA’s office we used to go out of for coffee all the time, you helped me with my cases. You left so suddenly.”

“Personal problems.” 

“We’ve all been there.” Daniels nodded, “I just don’t know why you’d switch to defense. Why this case? Why this woman?” 

“I just… I believe in her.” Gavin admitted, “she’s… I don’t know, she’s really something.” 

** 

The bailiff held open the door for Gavin. Gavin smiled, “thank you.” Sharon looked up from the table and Gavin walked over and set down one of the cups of coffee in front of her. 

She sighed and picked it up. “Thanks.” She sipped it. “Sorry I yelled at you…”

“I know. I’m starting to get a pretty good idea about you.” He sipped his own coffee, grinning triumphantly at her. “And your bark is much worse than your bite.”

Sharon shrugged, looking down into her coffee, “you’d be foolish to test that theory.” 

“That’s what every good friendship needs: the looming threat of physical violence.” He laughed. 

“We’re friends?” Sharon looked up suddenly. 

“Aren’t we?” 

She smiled a little, “do you think they serve coffee in prison?”

Gavin leaned back in his chair, crossing one leg over the other. “Oh, I would think so.” 

She sipped her coffee thoughtfully. “Thanks… for being my friend…” 

He smiled, “like it was a choice.”


	11. Chapter 11

“Court is now in session, Mr. Baker, call your next witness.” 

“Thank you, your honor,” Gavin stood up, smoothing down the front of his suit jacket. “I call Captain Sharon Raydor to the stand.”

“No!” Sharon hissed. “I told you I wasn’t taking the stand.” 

“Get up there and make it right for your son like you promised.” Gavin ground out in a harsh whisper. 

“You have no idea what would make things right; how dare you do this after I explicitly told you no.” 

“Captain, you’ve been called to the stand. I’ll get the bailiff to escort you, if necessary.” 

Sharon stood up from her seat, cast Gavin a glare and went to stand by the the witness chair. The bailiff approached and presented her with the Bible. “Do you solemnly swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth or help me God?” 

“I invoke my fifth amendment right not to implicate myself.”

“Captain, you have to take the oath and then you can plead the fifth.” 

“What’s the point? I’m not going to say anything.” 

“Put your hand on the Bible or I’m going to hold you in contempt of court.” Judge Cox warned. 

“Yes, sir.” Sharon laid her hand on the Bible. 

“Do you solemnly swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth or help me God?” The bailiff repeated. 

Sharon shook her head, “I don’t. May I sit down now?” 

Cox banged his gavel. “Yes, you can, and for your troubles you’ll be spending the night in lock-up.” 

“Thank you.” Sharon nodded and rejoined Gavin at the defense table. 

“What was that?” Gavin shook his head in disbelief. 

“I told you I wasn’t going to testify.” 

“Mr. Baker, call your next witness.” 

“I have no further witnesses, your honor.” Gavin sighed. 

“In that case, court is adjourned for the day. We will resume tomorrow at eight for closing statements.” Judge Cox banged his gavel. “Bailiff, please escort the Captain to the holding cell.” 

“Bailiff, may I have a moment with my client before you take her?”

He nodded, “that’s fine.” 

Gavin leaned in and whispered in Sharon’s ear. “That was a bad move. That was a very bad move.” 

Sharon smirked at him. “If Chief Johnson comes to the house looking for me tell her I’m looking forward to seeing her tomorrow.” 

“It’ll probably be the last time you see her without being separated by four-inch plexi.” Gavin put his hands on his hips. 

“I told you I wasn’t going to testify. Repeatedly.” Sharon reminded in a low warning tone. 

“You told your son you were going to make things right,” Gavin snapped, “how is this you making things right? Seems to me like you’re letting him down.” 

Sharon gritted her teeth and narrowed her eyes at Gavin angrily. She turned on her heel and walked up to the bailiff, “please take me to the holding cell. I have nothing more to say to that man.” 

**

_Sharon grabbed hold of a branch as she pulled herself forward. She was losing the light and it was starting to get cold; she was starting to get nervous._

_She stepped forward slowly, her senses heightened. She listened to the still of the night, there was no breeze, no sounds at all. Even the sound of her own breathing was shallow and almost completely inaudible._

_She heard the snap of a twig behind her just a millisecond too late and she caught a felled branch in the hip. She cried out and fell to the ground. She scrambled to get up but Terry held her down, he straddled her hips and grabbed a fistful of her hair._

_Sharon thrashed and struggled against him._

_“You fucking bitch!” He hissed, he pulled her head back painfully and she coughed. He pushed the barrel of the gun up against her temple. “You’re never going to see your children again._ Never again _.”_

_“Good fucking job, idiot, the safety’s on.” Sharon growled. “If you’re gonna do something at least do it right for once.”_

_He glared at her for a moment, pressing the gun harder against her. Finally, he pulled the gun back to check the safety. Sharon twisted and swung her elbow back, hitting his hand and the gun went flying. When he moved to retrieve it she wriggled out from under him._

_Before he could grab the gun she dragged him away by the fabric of his shirt. She pulled him up and then brought her knee up and caught him in the chest. He wheezed and fought against her and she kneed him again, this time in the chin._

_“Bitch!” He yelled, his mouth filling with blood. He jerked forward, ramming her back against a tree._

_Sharon still had his shirt balled in her fists but she let out a breathy gasp. He spat at her, blood spattering over her face, causing her to flinch. He grabbed her by the shoulders and threw her to the ground. She kept an iron grip on him and they rolled a few times until she ended up on top and she struck him in the nose._

_He yowled in pain. She pulled back and hit him again. “If there is_ one _way to strengthen a woman’s resolve,” she panted, hitting him unrelentingly, despite his attempts to block her blows. “It’s telling her she’ll never see her children again.”_

_Suddenly his body went limp and she panted, sitting back on her haunches. Her heart started to pound and her hands shook, she stood slowly, staring down at his unmoving form and his bloodied face._

_That had been the product of pure blind rage and now that it was over her stomach sank. She stared at him for a few long moments before she grabbed the gun and took off at a run._

_She had to get back to the car; she had to get back to civilization; something needed to be done._

**

Brenda walked up to the desk, “I need to see Captain Raydor.” 

The heavyset man behind the desk shook his head, “visiting hours are over.” 

Brenda pulled out her badge. “How about if I said please?” She tapped the metal on the table, drawing his attention. 

He sighed and nodded, “fine.” He pushed himself up out of his chair with audible discomfort and shuffled down the hallway, jingling his set of keys. He opened the door to area with the holding cells, “ten minutes. Holler if you need anythin’.” 

He shut the door behind him and Brenda stood there for a moment gazing down the row of three cells. 

“I have nothing to say to you, Gavin.” Sharon said dejectedly from the last cell. 

“It’s… Brenda.” She faltered, waiting for an invitation. 

“Oh, sorry.” There was a shuffle as Sharon pushed herself up from the stiff cot and her heels echoed as she walked up to the bars. “Are you going to come down here?” 

Brenda wasted no time closing the distance between them. Her heart wrenched seeing Sharon behind the bars. Suddenly she couldn’t bear to look Sharon in the eye. She reached out blindly and laid her hand over the cross bar. 

Sharon gently put her hand over Brenda’s and Brenda’s eyes fluttered shut. 

“Did Dylan get on the train alright?” 

Brenda flushed red, feeling guilty that she’d forgotten the whole reason she’d come. “I watched him get on the train and didn’t take my eyes off it till it pulled away.” Brenda nodded. “He seems like a great kid.” 

Sharon smiled, “he is.” 

“He’s worried about you.” Brenda looked up to meet Sharon’s gaze. Brenda lost her breath for a moment staring into Sharon’s intense, piercing emerald eyes. “He, um… he said he just wants things to work out. He said to tell you… that nothing else matters other than you getting to go home.” 

Sharon sighed heavily. “He’s a great kid…” 

Brenda turned her hand over and gave Sharon’s hand a squeeze. “Look…” Brenda breathed, leaning in even closer. “Whatever happens tomorrow…” 

“Shh.” Sharon interrupted her. “I know.”

Brenda stepped closer until she was almost flush with the bars and reached in and touched Sharon’s face. Sharon closed her eyes and Brenda let out a shaking breath. Sharon closed what little space remained between them and kissed her softly. 

The door opened. “Are you alright in-”

Brenda jumped back, her face flushing bright red. The guard chuckled to himself as he turned to leave again. “Dear Penthouse…” 

They were silent for a few long moments before Brenda looked up again. “I’m not sorry I kissed you.” Brenda whispered. 

“ _I_ kissed you actually, but who’s keeping score?” 

Brenda smiled. “Cool under fire.” 

“I try to be.” 

“Let me just say this…” Brenda paused to collect her thoughts, “I don’t know why you don’t want to get on the stand and I don’t know why you did what you did today… but I believe that you have your kids’ best interests at heart.” 

“I do.” 

“That’s what’s important. Just follow your heart.” 

Sharon smiled but didn’t answer. Brenda walked to the end of the hallway and knocked on the door. Keys rattled and it opened for her. 

“You sure you’re done? I could give you gals a little privacy… for a fee.” The guard leered. 

Brenda scowled. “No need. She’ll beat the charges.” 

The burly man scoffed, “I wouldn’t put money on that if I were you, sweetie.” 

“That’s _Deputy Chief_ Sweetie, to you.” 

“My apologies, ma’am.” He tipped his hat. “I just thought we were being informal considerin’ you were just in their neckin’ with my prisoner. But hey, I’m a simple man.” 

Brenda put her hands up. “ _You_ said it.” 

**

The bailiff led Sharon into the room, the cuffs clinking as she walked. Gavin approached them, “can you please take these off her before the jury comes in?” He snapped. 

Sharon held up her hands for him and the bailiff unlocked them before rolling his eyes and moved to stand by his post. Sharon rubbed her wrists a little. 

“Did you sleep okay?” Gavin asked. Sharon shrugged. Gavin sighed, “I hate it when we fight.” 

Sharon nodded, “I’m sorry.” She pushed her hands into her pockets. She bit her lip for a moment before saying, “if it’s not too late… You can put me on the stand.” 

Gavin nodded, “I can ask the judge. You’re sure?” 

“Yeah.” 

As soon as court was announced ‘in session,’ Gavin stood, “your Honor, may we approach the bench?” 

Judge Cox waved them forward. “What is it, Mr. Baker?”

“My client wishes to testify.” 

Cox scoffed, “after that whole scene yesterday?”

“Yes, your Honor. She’s had time to reflect and she knows she overreacted yesterday. She’s still suffering from a bit of Post-Traumatic-”

“Mr. Baker!” Cox held up his hand to stop him, “save it for closing statements. Mr. Daniels, do you have any objection to Captain Raydor taking the stand before closing statements?” 

Daniels held up his hands with a smirk, “I have no problem with Baker putting her on the stand.” 

“Alright then.” He banged his gavel, “Mr. Baker, call your witness.” 

“I call Captain Sharon Raydor to the stand.” 

Sharon stood, she glanced into the gallery as she passed and locked eyes with Brenda. She gave her a small smile before taking the stand. 

“Captain, can you describe the series of events that led up to the death of your husband?” 

**

_The adrenaline was wearing off as she trudged back through the woods; without Terry to worry about she was breathing a little easier. Her muscles were sore and her ankle throbbed but she tried to focus on getting back to the car before the temperature dropped too low._

_Finally she pushed past the last tree and stumbled onto the road. As she peered down the road in one direction after the other without seeing the car she looked up to the setting sun. She figured she’d continue heading east, the direction they’d been driving, and either find the car or hit a town._

_She tucked the gun into the belt of her dress and set off down the road, the hot pavement sticking to her feet with each step._

_The sun went down behind her as she walked as it got colder and colder. It was times like this that she missed L.A., there were no sprawling stretches of desolate landscape where she grew up. How she hadn’t hit a town or even passed by a sign that held a clue to exactly where she was was beyond her._

_Suddenly her shadow started to appear in front of her and she recognized the sound behind her as an approaching car. Relief flooded over her, her reprieve had arrived. She turned and shielded her eyes to catch the a glimpse of the driver and her heart sank._

_Terry had gotten up and retrieved the car._

_For the first time in this whole mess she felt completely fucked. She could wrestle a gun away from, she couldn’t wrestle a car away from him._

_Her adrenaline spiked and she darted down the road. The car continued to gain on her and she realized with despair that she would once again have to take refuge in the woods._

_Steeling herself, pushing herself to run just a little bit harder she turned sharply, diving into the woods. She made it just a few strides in before she tripped on a downed tree and went down. She put her hands up to cushion her fall but still hit her head. Her vision blacked out even as she struggled against it and her body sagged against the forest floor._

_When she regained consciousness she was disoriented. She reached up to cradle her head, it throbbed where she’d smacked it against the rock. She pushed herself up, her vision trying to focus._

_She realized that Terry hadn’t caught up with her. She sat up quickly, ignoring her body’s threat of passing out again. She didn’t see him._

_She got to her feet and gripped the gun as she stepped forward tentatively._

_“Sharon!” Terry called out. Sharon tensed, holding the gun out in front her at the ready. Then he called to her again, “Sharon! Sharon!”_

_It wasn’t angry; it was desperate._

_She jogged back to the roadside. He’d swerved into a tree trying to follow her. God only knew how fast he’d been going, the front end of the car was completely smashed in and the fire licked higher._

_Sharon backed away from the car, afraid that it was going to blow. She backed all the way to the other side of the road until her back hit a tree and she stood, glued to the spot, watching with horror._

_Why wasn’t he getting out of the car?_

_“Sharon… for God’s sake…” He wailed._

_A sob caught in her throat as she realized that the fire had reached the interior. Terry howled in pain, struggling to free himself to no avail. His cries became louder and more desperate the more he panicked._

_Sharon felt like all the air in her body was sucked out as she looked on. Terry turned to her and locked eyes with her, pleading with her._

_Sharon put her shoulders back and lifted the gun. She held it with both hands to keep it steady, she cocked the hammer and then squeezed the trigger and he stopped screaming for her._

_She lowered the gun, letting it drop to the street as she stared at the car. She thought that she’d feel relieved knowing it was over but she felt empty and awash with despair. The fire crackled and burned, the light dancing across the pavement._

_Slowly, she sank to the ground. The heat from the fire would stave off the cold; she didn’t have the strength to start walking again. She’d either be rescued from right there or she’d succumb to a combination of her injuries and the elements. Either way she wasn’t moving from that spot until someone came to get her._

_She leaned her head back against the tree and stared up into the branches. She would do her best to keep her eyes open; she would fight the urge to black out._

_To her surprise she felt tears rolling down her cheeks. She reached up and wiped them away with the back of her hand, wiping dirt across her face as she did. She wasn’t sure why she was crying exactly, just that it was over and something was beginning._

_No matter what happened from that point forward was better than how it had been. Of that she was sure. With that thought she smiled as she started to sob._

**

Daniels stood up and approached the witness box. “Thank you for your testimony, Captain. I’m sure that must have been difficult for you to relive. I just have a few questions for you.”

Sharon nodded. 

“You say that your husband was after you, is that correct?” 

“Yes.” 

“Why didn’t you say this to the police at any point? Why is this the first time we’re hearing this self-defense?” 

“It’s on the record now and my children will know what their father did and I didn’t want to put them through that. I didn’t want to take away their good memories of him.” 

“Your children are very important to you, aren’t they?”

“My children are everything to me.” 

Daniels walked back to his table and picked up a file. “Okay, help me to understand this then: your file says that you often worked upwards of 60 hours a week. Does that sound like someone to whom their children are everything?” 

“And I suppose here in Georgia you’d like your police force to work part time?” Sharon scowled. “I’ve worked as hard as I do for the safety of my children as well as everyone else’s.” 

“You and your husband were alone on this trip. You sent your children to Florida.”

“I’m sorry, was that a question?” Sharon smirked. 

“Okay, Captain. Let’s say the series of events happened just like you said. He was coming after you and you defended yourself… I’ve had my share of fights with women but what possessed your mild-mannered architect to… Why did you bring your service revolver with you?” 

“I didn’t. He brought it without my knowledge. I’m very serious about gun safety and my gun never leaves the trunk of my car when I’m off duty. I keep it in a lock box.” 

“And how did he get your gun?” 

“I don’t know. I have the only key.” 

“You have the only key and you want us to believe that it was your _husband_ and not _you_ that brought the gun?”

Sharon shrugged with annoyance. “I’m just telling you the truth, believe what you want.” 

“Why would your husband be so angry with you that he’d want to kill you?” Daniels leaned over the witness box, getting in Sharon’s personal space. 

“Objection,” Gavin stood. “Calls for speculation.” 

“Sustained.” Judge Cox agreed. 

“And your honor, can you ask opposing counsel to take a few steps back? He has no reason to be that close; he’s cross-examining not performing a dental exam.”

“Mr. Daniels,” Judge Cox nodded, “please step back.” 

“Did your husband give you any indication of why he was trying to kill you?” 

“Yes, he did.” 

The court room was silent, awaiting Sharon’s continuation.

Judge Cox cleared his throat, “Captain, I believe Mr. Daniels would you like you to elaborate.” 

Sharon smirked, “well, he should have said.” Sharon paused for a moment, “my husband was very angry with me, and had been for a while, because I’d had an affair.” 

“Had your husband threatened you with divorce?”

“No.” Sharon shook her head, “we were trying to work it out for the sake of our children.” 

“And he just got tired of trying it work it out?”

“Objection, calls for speculation again.” 

“Sustained.” 

“I don’t see why Mr. Daniels keeps insisting my client attempt to explain her own attempted murder.” 

“I said _sustained_ , counsel.” Cox sighed, “save the rest for closing statements.” 

“I withdraw the question anyway, your honor.” Mr. Daniels paused in thought for a moment. “Ok, captain, help me understand how the two of you went from working it out to him trying to kill you to him being shot in the head and burned to a crisp. Had anything changed at home in the days leading up to his death?” 

“In the days leading up to the events in question I’d been part of a sting operation on a ring of policemen who were dealing stolen narcotics which kept me from the house. He often became very agitated with me when I had to be out of the house at night.”

“Who’s the primary breadwinner in your household?”

“It’s about equal.” 

“You purchased the house, didn’t you?”

“Yes.” 

“And you lived there alone for several years before you met your husband?” 

“My son and I lived there before I met Terry.” 

“You paid cash?”

“It was at a time when real estate was very cheap, the owners needed the sale to go through asap and I was able to pay it up front.” 

“How?” 

Sharon heaved an inner sigh already knowing that Daniels was going to make a big deal about her answer. “Life insurance.” Sharon said, “my mother died when I was 22 and I was her sole heir and my first husband was a police officer who was killed in the line of duty in 1996. I purchased our house and most of what’s left are in college funds for all three of my children.” 

“College is getting expensive, figured you’d need a little more life insurance?” 

“ _Objection_!” Gavin cried, standing. “He’s making light of the deaths of my client’s family members. She is a decorated, high ranking police officer and he has absolutely _no_ grounds for this line of questioning.” 

“Your honor, may I rephrase?”

Cox sighed, “proceed cautiously, Mr. Daniels, or I’ll sustain the objection.” 

“Yes, your honor.” Daniels cleared his throat. “Isn’t it true that if the two of you had gotten a divorce you would have split your assets which would include the house that he didn’t pay a cent for and whatever’s left from your mother’s and first husband’s life insurance? Isn’t true that you would have suffered significant financial loss?” 

“Look. I’ve been with the police for thirty years and most of my experience has been in internal affairs. I have spent an entire career holding police officers accountable for their actions. I can only imagine that you think I’m completely stupid to put in motion such an obvious plot.” Sharon sneered. “I already had one child lose his father and I didn’t want to put my other two children through that trauma. I would give up everything to keep my children safe and happy.” 

“Alright Captain Raydor, for arguments sake, let’s say that everything happened as you said. Why shoot him if he was already stuck in the car with no means of escaping his fate?”

“Because he was screaming.” Sharon said in a low voice. The entire court room leaned forward to hear better. “Because he was being burned alive and he was… _screaming_. He begged me.” 

“No more questions.”

“Captain, you may step down.” 

Sharon stood from her seat, “I’m truly sorry that you think I’d be less culpable if I’d let him burn to death.” 

“Your honor!” Daniels objected. 

“The jury is instructed to disregard the Captain’s remark.” The judge instructed as Sharon walked back to the defense table. 

**

Sharon sat in her seat in the conference room, arms crossed with indifference. Brenda paced nervously and Gavin drummed his fingers on the table, glancing at the clock entirely too often. 

“Gavin.” Sharon said, drawing the attention of her companions. “I’d love a coffee.” 

“Sure.” He nodded, actually happy to have the distraction. 

Brenda took the seat that Gavin had just vacated. Brenda searched Sharon’s face as Sharon looked on impassively. “ _How_ are you so calm?” 

“Because it’s over.” Sharon said simply with a small smile like it was the most obvious thing in the world. Sharon took Brenda’s hand in both of hers. “No matter what happens I did what I had to do and it’s over.” 

“I don’t want you to have to leave.” Brenda admitted. 

Sharon brought Brenda’s hand to her lips and kissed her knuckles softly. Sharon’s hands were warm and Brenda found herself unable to look at Sharon. She rubbed her eyes with her free hand and sighed. 

“You’ll be okay.” Sharon smiled. 

Brenda looked over at her and let out a guffaw. 

The door opened and Gavin walked in with the coffee. Sharon took it with one hand, the other still holding Brenda’s. Gavin shoved his hands into his pockets. 

After a while the coffee was gone and the room was deafeningly silent. When Gavin’s phone vibrated he pulled it out of his pocket. “The jury’s back.” 

**

“Will the defendant please rise?” Judge Cox instructed; Sharon and Gavin both rose. “Madame Forewoman, have you reached a unanimous verdict?”

“We have your honor.” 

“What say you?” 

“On the count of murder, we the jury find the defendant guilty.” 

“Thank you for your service,” Cox banged his gavel, “court is adjourned. Bailiff?” 

Sharon held out her hand to shake Gavin’s. Gavin stared at it dumbly for a moment before shaking her hand with melancholy. “I’m very glad I met you.” 

“Same.” He managed to sputter out. “We’ll appeal this.” 

Sharon had already turned to Brenda, “I’ll write you.” Brenda nodded, unable to speak. 

She held her hands up for the bailiff who secured the cuffs on her wrist and led her out.


	12. Chapter 12

Sharon’s fingers splayed over the four-inch plexi, smiling hugely at her daughter. “Hi princess,” Sharon breathed, “I swear, you’re almost a grown up, look how big you are!” 

“I miss you, mommy.” Faith put her hand up to the plexi. 

“I miss you too. I’m so glad your grandmother finally brought you to see me. I think of you and your brothers every day.” 

Jesse climbed onto the seat next to his little sister. “Hi mom.” 

“Hi baby,” Sharon breathed, feeling overcome. 

“How are you doin’?” 

“I’m doing fine, sweetie.” 

Faith toyed with the cord for the phone, “when are you coming home?” 

“Oh, not for a while, honey.” The sight of her children tugged at her heart strings. 

“What about Dylan?” Faith looked up. 

“What about Dylan?” Sharon furrowed her brow in confusion. “Isn’t he here?” 

Faith shook her head. Jesse spoke up, “he’s been gone for a couple weeks.” 

“Faith, Jesse, I need to speak to your grandmother, can you go get her for me?” Sharon asked, trying to remain calm. 

The adolescents disappeared and her mother-in-law appeared in their place. “What did you do with my son?” Sharon demanded in a menacing whisper. 

“Well, that’s a fine how-do-you-do.” Mallory scowled, “don’t even thank me for bringing the kids.” 

“Mallory, I’m not fucking around,” Sharon warned, “ _what did you do with Dylan_?”

Mallory pursed her lips, “he’s not really ours. He’s the son of the woman who murdered my baby, why would I want him around?”

“Where’s Dylan?” Sharon was gritting her teeth so hard that she was already developing a headache. 

“We sent him back with child services, going into foster care, I expect.” 

Sharon hung up the phone abruptly. Mallory wasn’t going to be any more help and Sharon was only going to lose her temper. She stood up and the guard approached her. “Ready to go back?”

“I need to call my attorney.” Sharon said, her mind racing and her heart pounding. 

**

That night, Sharon curled into a tight ball, clutching her pillow. She was fighting it with every ounce of her strength but the desire to cry was beginning to overtake her. 

She grit her teeth, thinking about how much she hated her mother-in-law. 

Dylan could practically be anywhere in anyone’s care. She had no idea where he was or what his living conditions were like. The sadness and anger churned in her stomach as she rolled onto her back, staring up at the ceiling. 

**

Brenda sat in the visitor’s chair flipping through a folder when Sharon took her seat. Brenda looked up and smiled a little, she took the phone off the hook and put it to her ear. “It’s good to see you.” 

“You too.” 

Brenda cleared her throat, “Gavin’s working on getting you a new trial. We haven’t located Dylan yet, child services doesn’t want to give me the information because I’m not family and it’s not pertaining to an open investigation but I’m working on it.” 

“Thank you.” 

“Now for the good news.” Brenda continued, “they found your gun.” 

“Good…” Sharon paused in thought, “I kind of lost track of it…” 

“Terry’s prints are on it in all the right places, concrete evidence that he held the gun. Plus we’ve got your defensive wounds. The real piece de resistance, though, is the consumer safety report for the car. It has a known defect where in crashes the person in the driver’s seat is often pinned. Basically, the bottom line is that all the physical evidence supports your version of events.” 

“You know… I’ve been thinking about the gun. About how he got it… I arrived home and we were on the road within half an hour and my keys never left my person. There is no spare key to the _box_ but Terry had a key to my _car_.” 

Brenda nodded, “he must have broken the lock on the box.” 

“You could ask someone from NOPD to swing by the house and check.” 

“I’ll do that.” Brenda smiled, “and I will find Dylan.” 

“I know you will.” 

**

“Hey, you wanted to see me?” Daniels poked his head into District Attorney’s office. 

“Yes, come in.” Mason Porter gestured for Daniels to have a seat in one of the chairs in front of his desk. “It’s about the Raydor retrial.” 

“I’m on it, sir.” 

“Forget it, I want to drop it.” 

Daniels furrowed his brow. “Sir?” 

“I’ve been looking over Gavin’s packet and it’s good. There’s a very good chance that the new trial will overturn the conviction. The evidence they have is very compelling.” 

“It’s pretty much circumstantial.” 

“So is yours.” Porter objected. “You got away with it at trial but you’re not going to get away with it a second time. Certainly not when you add in the new evidence. _Yes_ , she’s admitted to shooting him but the new evidence supports her version of events. It’s not worth the time.” 

“Yes, sir.” Daniels nodded. 

“Let her go back to Louisiana, let her be their problem.” 

**

Sharon walked out into the sunshine, her heels clicking on the asphalt. The guard opened the gate for her and she stepped out into freedom. 

Brenda walked up to her and pulled her into a firm hug. Sharon splayed her fingers out over Brenda’s back, holding her tightly. She squeezed her eyes shut, “thank you for picking me up.” 

“Like I was just going to leave you here?” 

Sharon smiled. 

“Now get in the car, we’re wasting daylight.” Brenda opened the driver’s door and got in, “I found Dylan and we’re going to go get him.” 

Sharon rushed around to the passenger side and tossed her bag of personal items into the backseat, “thank God.” She breathed, pulling on her seat belt. “Where is he?”

“Austin, Texas in a boys’ group home.” Brenda started the engine. 

Sharon reached over and took Brenda’s face in her hands pulling her in for a kiss. Brenda sighed against Sharon’s lips. The kiss was firm and sweet. When Sharon pulled back she gently stroked Brenda’s cheek. 

“Thank you for finding him and everything you’ve done for me.”


	13. Chapter 13

The drive was mostly silent, the sun was setting in front of them. It was dark before they had even made it forty miles and by the time they hit the Alabama border their stomachs were growling too loudly to be ignored any longer. 

There were only a couple of other people in the small town diner and the waitress moved around the tables, wiping them down and moving on. 

“More coffee, hun?” She asked Sharon. 

Sharon looked up at her, “um… yes, please.” She held up her mug. 

The waitress refilled the cup, the steam rising from the burnt coffee. “Everything okay with your food, hun? You didn’t hardly touch it.” 

Sharon sipped the coffee. “The food’s fine, I’m just… preoccupied.” 

“We’ll take the check,” Brenda smiled at the waitress. She felt sure that Sharon didn’t want to talk – if the silent two hours in the car were any indication. 

The waitress tore their check off her pad and set it on the table. “Take your time.” 

Brenda reached for the check and Sharon picked it up first. “Please let me,” Sharon dug her wallet out of her purse. She was almost surprised to see that she still had two twenties and a five in the bill slot. 

She laid twenty five down on the check and sipped her coffee again. She smirked, “almost as bad as prison coffee.” 

Brenda laughed, leaning forward, “and the food?” 

“The food is fine, really… a little greasy but it’s diner food.” She shrugged, “I’m just too anxious.” 

“We’ll take it with us, you can eat it later if you’re hungry.” 

Sharon nodded, taking a big swig of her coffee. 

“Maybe we should stop and sleep for a couple of hours.” 

“I want to stay on the road.” Sharon protested. “If you’re tired I can drive.” 

“And then by the time we get there to pick Dylan up you’ll have been up for over 24 hours?” Brenda raised her eyebrows, “I think it would be best if we got some sleep in an actual bed, not just in the car. If we drive all night and get there late in the morning we’ll be ready to crash and he’ll be awake. If we sleep tonight and get there in the evening we’ll all be on the same sleep schedule.” 

“I guess you’re right…” Sharon sighed, “yeah, okay.” 

**

Brenda opened the door to their room. “Oh, there’s just the one bed…”

“Do you mind?” Sharon asked with some surprise. 

Brenda laughed nervously. “I just would have figured you’d want your own bed since you just got out of prison and had to share everything.” 

“We didn’t share _beds_. I’ve actually always been able to sleep better with someone else.” Sharon put her hand on her hip and narrowed her eyes, “Brenda, are you _nervous_? Would you like me to get my own room?” 

“ _No!_ ” Brenda answered hurriedly. “No… no.” 

Sharon smiled. “You’re cute.” 

“I just really want to kiss you but I don’t want to be presumptuous. I mean, you’ve got a lot on your mind and you just got out of prison…”

“There’s something you should definitely know about me.” Sharon said seriously, stepping up to Brenda. “I never say no to kisses.” 

Brenda smiled a little, feeling herself relax. She wrapped her arms around Sharon and pulled her in for a soft, chaste kiss. Sharon smiled contentedly, wrapping her arms tighter around Brenda and nuzzling Brenda’s blond waves. 

“Thank you so much for everything.” Sharon whispered. 

Brenda’s hands stroked Sharon’s back rhythmically. “My pleasure.” She gave Sharon a squeeze and let her go. They separated and watched each other for few long moments. 

“I guess we should get ready for bed.” Brenda announced. “you can use the bathroom first, if you’d like.” 

“Thanks.” Sharon laughed, “that is something we had to share.” 

Sharon disappeared into the bathroom and Brenda put her overnight bag on the bed. Her mother would be appalled at her sloppy packing, Brenda thought to herself as she dug through the contents to find her pyjamas. Finally she pulled them out fleece pants and a t-shirt decorated with penguins. 

She’d just finished putting her pjs on when Sharon stepped back into the room. She was wearing just a tank top and her underwear and Brenda looked away modestly. “Do you have a side of the bed?” Brenda asked, fluffing up the pillows distractedly. 

“No, I’m not picky.” Sharon dropped the rest of her clothes in the chair. 

Brenda climbed under the covers, her heart thudding in her chest. Sharon was about to get into bed with her. Of course, in the preceding months she’d imagined this moment many times. Now that it was upon her she was starting to doubt herself. 

Sharon shut off the light and crossed to the bed, getting under the covers. Brenda turned on her side toward Sharon and slipped her fingers into Sharon’s silky locks. Sharon leaned in and captured Brenda’s lips. 

Brenda parted her lips, inviting Sharon to deepen the kiss. Sharon pulled her closer as she kissed her harder, Brenda whimpered into the kiss, dragging her fingernails down Sharon’s shoulder. 

Brenda moved to straddle Sharon as they kissed, breaking apart only long enough for gulps of air. Sharon took Brenda’s hands and pushed them up her shirt. Brenda’s hands moved over Sharon’s breasts, squeezing them gently before breaking the kiss. She pushed Sharon’s shirt up and leaned over to take Sharon’s nipple into her mouth. 

Sharon moaned, arching her back, her fingers tangling in Brenda’s hair. Brenda switched to the other nipple and Sharon gasped. “God, Brenda…” 

Brenda swirled her tongue around the sensitive peak; Sharon writhed beneath her. Brenda’s hand smoothed over Sharon’s abdomen as it travelled lower. She cupped Sharon’s sex through her panties, rubbing gently. 

Sharon groaned, bringing up her thigh to Brenda’s center, Brenda ground down against her. Sharon wriggled out from underneath Brenda and helped her out of her pyjama bottoms before scooting down again. 

With her hands on Brenda’s ass, she encouraged her forward until Brenda’s sex was positioned above Sharon’s mouth. Sharon dragged her tongue along Brenda’s opening; Brenda gasped, gripping the headboard for support. 

Sharon’s tongue moved over the slick folds, making Brenda squirm and sigh. Sharon swirled her tongue around Brenda’s clit. Brenda gasped and let out a long low moan. Sharon’s grip on Brenda’s hips kept her tethered in place even while Brenda squirmed and wiggled. 

“Sharon…” Brenda chanted as she felt her orgasm building. She dug her nails into the quilted headboard, rolling her hips into Sharon’s mouth. Sharon held her tightly as Brenda started to tremble and her muscles started to spasm. Brenda let out a series of loud moans as her orgasm washed over her. 

When Brenda’s orgasm subsided she moved to lay next to Sharon. Sharon covered her body, capturing her lips. Brenda slipped her fingers into Sharon’s hair, groaning as she tasted herself on Sharon’s tongue. 

Brenda’s hand slipped into Sharon’s panties as they kissed. Sharon bucked against her hand, aching for the contact. Brenda’s fingers explored Sharon’s folds before easily sliding into her. Sharon’s eyes fluttered shut as she moaned, burying her face against Brenda’s shoulder. 

Brenda groaned, Sharon was so tight and warm and dripping wet. “Sharon, you’re so beautiful.” Brenda whispered as her fingers slid in and out of her. 

Sharon whimpered, moaning and bucking into Brenda’s thrusts. Brenda added a third finger and Sharon cried out, “oh fuck… yes…” 

Sharon’s inner muscles clamped down almost painfully on Brenda’s fingers as she pushed them deeper into Sharon, curling up to press against the sensitive tissue. 

Sharon bit her lip as her muscles started spasming around Brenda, her entire body tensing and pulsing and then going slack. 

Sharon rolled over onto her back and Brenda nestled against her. Sharon wrapped her arms around her. 

**

In the morning, they woke up to Brenda’s cell phone alarm. Brenda stretched out, getting up slowly, yawning and rubbing her eyes. Sharon got right out of bed and stretched her arms and the reached down to touch her toes. 

Sharon went to her clothes in the chair. “Oh, I have the clothes that you had at Gavin’s in the car.” Brenda said, pulling on her pyjama pants and slipping on her pumps. “Give me a sec.” She grabbed her keys and disappeared out the door. 

Sharon went into the bathroom and brushed her teeth and washed her face. She was glad that Brenda had convinced her to stop for the night. Their motel certainly wasn’t a Hilton but the bed was a lot more comfortable than prison had been and she relished washing her face with warm water without having to elbow anyone out of the way. 

The door opened again and Brenda set down the suitcase. “Gavin said you could keep the suitcase.” 

“Thanks,” Sharon chuckled as she opened it and pulled out a fresh outfit. The room was silent except for the rustling of clothes as they dressed. 

“Let’s grab coffee and get on the road.” Brenda announced once she’d finished dressing. “We can stop for breakfast in an hour or two.” 

“Brenda?”

“Hmm?”

“Can I tell you something?” Sharon asked seriously. 

“Of course.” 

Sharon sat down on the bed and Brenda lowered herself to the bed with skepticism. “What is it?”

“Everything happened just the way I said it did. We were driving and Terry pulled a gun on me and running through the woods and the fight and the car… but that’s not really the whole story.” Sharon looked off into space before turning back to Brenda. “I was planning on killing him. I planned the whole camping trip with the intention of killing him. My plan was good it was going to look like an accident there wasn’t going to be any trial.”

Brenda furrowed her brow. “But _why_?” Brenda demanded, “was it really about the money?” 

“No.” Sharon shook her head, “it wasn’t ever about money. I don’t care about the money, I only care about my children.” 

“Well, then, why?” 

**

_The dryer buzzed and Sharon pushed herself off the couch. Admittedly, it had been a while since she’d shouldered any of the responsibility for the laundry and when she walked into the laundry room she saw that some of the things had been moved around._

_Had it really been that long? When did she get so out of touch? Was it irreversible? Did she even really have a place in this family that very clearly functioned perfectly well without her? Was it pure selfishness that she wanted to try? Would it be better for everyone if she walked away like Terry thought she should?_

_Terry had been such a good person when they’d met. He was trusting and he was loving; was she poison, had she ruined him? Did she ruin everything and everyone she cared about?_

_Would it be better for everyone if she just left?_

_She folded the laundry and headed for the stairs. Once she’d reached Dylan’s door, she knocked. She received no answer; she was met only with loud music. She knocked again, “Dyl! Open up! I’ve got your laundry.”_

_She waited and listened and heard no tell-tale sounds of approaching footsteps. She knocked once more before opening the door._

_"Mom!" Dylan protested with mortification, standing in the middle of his room holding his pyjama shirt, preparing to put it on, but caught like a deer in headlights by the bright light from the hallway behind her._

_She stared at her son in wide-eyed dismay and felt like she was on the verge of hyperventilation. She took a step inside the room and set the laundry basket on the floor and shut the door quietly. His eyes filled up with tears and he squeezed them tightly shut, wanting everything to just stop, wanting the last minute to be erased._

_She walked up to him slowly, not wanting to upset him anymore._

_He opened his eyes and looked at the expression on her face and he felt his stomach wrench and he let out a single sob._

_She reached out toward the purple, bruised flesh and stopped milimeters away from it. Her eyes moved from one bruise to the next, she circled him and found more on his back. On one of his shoulder blades was a bruise that was mostly healed but was still that sickly yellow and she reached out and touched it gently, causing Dylan to shiver._

_"Who did this?" She asked in a whisper, her voice shaking with barely contained rage._

_"Just forget it, please." Dylan pleaded. "It's nothing, please."_

_"This is not nothing. Dylan Anthony Raydor, to my knowledge you've never lied to me before and I need you to be_ honest _and to_ trust _me." She said firmly and supportively. "Let me help you. Tell me who did this. Are you having problems with someone at school?"_

 _Dylan cast his eyes downward to the floor, at the forgotten pyjama shirt. She would never know_ how badly _he wanted to tell her it was someone at school. He didn't want his hell to be her hell too but he couldn't bring himself to lie to her. All the cards were already on the table and there was no taking them back now._

_He shook his head slowly._

_She took in a deep breath. "Is the person who did this to you an adult?"_

_He nodded._

_"Is it a man?"_

_He nodded._

_Sharon took a couple of deep breaths, her heart was pounding so hard she thought it might have actually stopped. She felt her head spinning and all of a sudden she felt the need to ground herself, she put her hands on Dylan's shoulders and looked into his eyes._

_"Terry?" She whispered._

_Dylan fought back tears and nodded, "yeah..."_

_Sharon wrapped her arms around his shoulders as gently as she could, pulling him closer. She gently brought his head to rest against the side of hers. “I am so sorry…” she breathed, “this is all my fault.”_

_“No, mom, no…”_

_“I will_ fix _this, Dylan.”_


End file.
